The Hodgepodge

Hello!

I am joining in on The Hodgepodge today!

1. National Read a Road Map Day falls on April 5th. Would people say you have a good sense of direction? Do you rely on a GPS when you drive somewhere new?
When was the last time you used a map?
 
My husband is right here.  I shall ask him.
***
He didn’t even look at me.  He shook his head, “no.”
I do have to use GPS when I am somewhere new.
Let’s just say that I commonly hear the GPS lady shouting,
“RECALCULATING! RECALCULATING!”
I used to think north was just whatever was straight in front me.
  This caused me great confusion for my first 20-ish years.
 Sometimes common sense is challenging for me.
2. What’s your favorite cookbook?
 
I don’t know if I have a favorite. 
 I have a lot of cookbooks with one or two recipes in them that I use often.
 I like The Dinner Doctor by Anne Byrne.
I use AllRecipes a lot.
And I use my imagination a lot.
I should refrain from the imaginative cooking. 
It causes Handsome Dude great stress in life. 
3. What painting would you like to “walk into” and experience? Why?
 
The only paintings I see are penmarks made by naughty children on my walls.
I’ve experienced them enough.  I would like to paint over them.
4. What annoys you more- misspellings or mispronunciations?
 
I think mispronunciations are HI-larious.
For example, my husband says the word “measure” like “MAY-zure.”
And he says “creek” like “crick.”
It makes me feel superior to him when I correct him. 
 He let’s me have my moment, seeing as how my moments are so few.
  (Please see the aforementioned “North” quandary above.)
5. What is something your mother or father considered important?
 
On my 17th birthday, I was permitted to have BOYS and GIRLS over at my house for my birthday party.
What were my parents not thinking?
Anyways.  As we were all watching a movie, my dad walked down the stairs.
Remember my dad?
DSC_0060
Well, back then, everyone thought he was terrifying.  And who could blame them?
So, my dad stops the movie and starts in on this story.
“Back in the year blah-blah-blah, I lived in this apartment.  I remember it because . . . .
blah blah blah
drone drone drone
yada yada yada
no one’s really listening to me . . .
Anyways, people used to park on the wrong side of the street.  It used to make me so mad! 
 So tonight, as I see all your cars parked the wrong way on the street,  I wonder if my neighbors are annoyed at me.
Move your cars.”
So, all my friends got up and left.
And I am not sure if many of them came back.
My dad does not like it when people park the wrong way.
He finds it quite vexing.
6. Do you like or dislike schedules?
 
I love creating schedules. 
It gives me a sense of purpose and fantasticness. 
Is fantasticness a word?
I vote yes!
I do, however, forget to follow my schedules.
Which makes me feel not-so-fantastic.
7. Let’s have some fun with National Poetry Month
 (that would be April)…write your own ending to this poem-
“Roses are Red
Violets are blue…”
Roses are Red
Violets are blue
My name is Taylor
How do you do?
***
Oh, darn.  That was dumb.  And I thought about it for a good five minutes.
Oh, well.
8. Insert your own random thought in this space
I gave our dog, Lucy, a bath today.
She was really smelly, on account of all her running around the fields and horse pastures and lagoons and whatnot.
She has an appointment soon for her spaying, so I thought I should spruce her up a bit.
Gross, I know. 
 But these are the facts of life, readers.
These are the facts of life.
It’s been awhile since I have given Lucy a bath. 
 I would guesstimate that she has put on about 35 pounds since the last bath.
It was quite the treat to get her into the tub.
I was able to lift her up into the tub, on account of my massive muscles.
(Don’t pretend you aren’t impressed)
The only shampoo I had for her was something like “Enchanting Waterfalls.”
She was actually, dare I say it, well-behaved during the bath.
And I think she was enchanted by the delightful waterfall scent, seeing as how she kept licking my arms the whole time.
She did, however, jump out of the bath whilst she was all soapy. 
But don’t fret, dear readers!
I was able to leap across the bathroom in time to catch her.
I have gazelle-like skills.
So, anyways.
I hope that her enticing scent will be enough to deter the
vet from the fact that she is uber naughty.
Maybe he will also “fix” her naughtiness.
Hardy.
Har.
Har.
Alright.  Goodbye.
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16 Responses to The Hodgepodge

  1. Marla says:

    I haven’t given Justice a bath in an entire year. What can I say? He’s a very lazy dog who only goes outside to do his business. In that year, he has put on over 100 pounds. I dread the day I decide he stinks.

  2. Expat says:

    You have my total respect for bathing a dog that size by yourself. Muscles and gazelle like speed, I lack.

  3. Joyce says:

    I will now think gazelle when I think of you : ) Congrats on accomplishing the bath though-that is major! Spaying may not fix all her naughtiness but it should help.

    So glad you played along today…I always love a story from the dad files. My dad was the silent scary type too. My hubs referred to him as ‘The Colonel”…he was a softy though down deep inside.

  4. Tammy says:

    Glad you joined today. Enjoyed reading your answers. Oh yes, can relate with the painting–a parent can-now that they are older-I wish they were younger again.

  5. Christine C says:

    I HATE when the lady says that she is RECALCULATING!! She says it like she is superir and it’s really annoying:)

    By the way it is “crick” and not “creek”

    In my town, you will get a ticket for parking on the wrong side of the street. Your Dad would be happy:)

  6. Nathalie says:

    First of all, I HATE the annoying GPS voice. I sure wish someone would hire a man with a sexy voice. Maybe I would be more inclined to follow the directions given!

  7. B says:

    Dog bathing outside works too. Have 3 -5 gallon buckets warm water ready , shampoo and plastic container to dip water and pour over dog. Leash devildog to post , talk to her sweetly, commence to wash in the fastest way possible to get water on shampoo mixed with water on then rinse………let loose the devil and she will run,shake and run some more…..after she has drip dried for a half hour or so….dry with dog towels(no not made of dogs). Do this on sunny windy day so drying is expedited.
    I was dually impressed with your muscles and your gazelleness. 🙂

  8. Michelle Dawn says:

    I love your poem! This was a cool idea for a post 🙂 Dont feel bad I use GPS too! I get lost all the time. Have a good day!

  9. I think a good sense of direction is highly over rated. Those are the people who, when they do get lost, have no idea how to recover.

    You and I, on the other hand, are probably masters at getting unlost.

  10. Jill says:

    Your dad stories always crack me up. So glad you joined the Hodgepodge–I knew you would have good answers!

  11. Sheena says:

    I think it’s pretty funny that your husband just shook his head NO when you asked him about your sense of direction – totally made my day.

  12. MindyLou says:

    Okay, um, so how do YOU say “measure”?? Cause I’m pretty sure I say it the way LJ does, and can’t think of how else to say it…hmmm….also, my family says crik instead of creek. My parents say it’s how you can tell a native from a *ahem* not native in these parts, or a city-slicker from a country/farm person. Just so ya know.

  13. Susan says:

    Oh Taylor washing a dog that size is an OUTSIDE job! Just hose ‘er off. 🙂
    We used to have paintings just like yours. Once it was a ship done with purple crayon on the off-white carpet. Oh, were they ever happy! (You know that book, right?)
    Thanks for stopping by my blog. Yes, my BIL Steve is definitely fun. Reminds me a little of your LJ. 🙂 Have a great day!

  14. Beth says:

    I have those pen and crayon markings all over my house too! I thought maybe Mallory was adding to the decor the other day so I said, “Mallory, you’re not writing on the wall are you?” And she huffed at me and haughtily informed me that she hadn’t done such a thing since she was 4! (She’s 6 now. I don’t think I’ve procrastinated on cleaning my walls that long but … maybe!)

  15. datenut says:

    My favorite is Better Homes and Gardens checkerboard book. But favorite and cook never exist in the same sentence in my world. I use a map always – last time today at noon. And it’s ‘anyway’ not anywayS. You brought it up. 🙂

  16. that is one thing i DO NOT MISS about having pets…the bathing, that is…
    that and the uber naughtiness….
    but lucyfur is so darned cute!!! 🙂

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