Loogies and Handlebars

Have you ever walked into your bathroom and found your 3 year old stark naked, standing on the counter, trying to “get da bugs!” with your hair dryer?

Me neither.

But if it were to happen to me, let me assure you that the hair dryer would surely be unplugged.

We’re pretty big on safety over here.

I need to answer more questions!  I begged, nay pleaded, with you all to ask me a question assuring you I deeply needed these questions in order to formulate a blog post.  Obviously, I am a liar.  But, oh well, let us press on.

(To visit the first questions and answers posts, click here, then here.  In that order.  Or else.)

(Or don’t.  Your choice.)

From Katie Brn:

(Katie asked me LOTS of questions, making her my newest BFF, holla, Katie, holla!  I am not sure I can answer all of them, but I will do my best)

(For the record, my so-called “friend,” Bimlissa did not ask me a question.  Just an FYI.)

What do you do for yourself? As in, what do you do, or think you should do, with the few minutes you are allowed to yourself a week? (and blogging doesn’t count!)

By the time I have a few minutes, it is about 830pm.  David and I usually have 4th meal and watch shows until David falls asleep at 854pm.

You may ask, “Taylor!  What is 4th meal?”

Well.  A long time ago, David and I got into the habit of eating a bowl of ice cream every night while watching TV.  We made the switch to popcorn deeming it much healthier.

Because we choose to believe it is healthier.  And don’t tell us otherwise.

We also partake of sodas.  David will often add a large mug of hot cocoa, because it makes his tummy feel pleasant, and we have recently added peanut M&Ms to 4th meal.

We are healthnuts.

So, that’s what we do.  We sit and eat our healthier choices.

Have you ever heard the song “Taylor, the latte boy?” I know you aren’t a boy, but I always think of that song when I read your blog. That and Monte Python’s “Lumberjack Song” but don’t be affended that the only thing that ties them to this blog in my brain are the names . . .

No, I haven’t heard that song.  But my husband used to ALWAYS since that Lumberjack song until I told him what it was really saying.  It totally burst his bubble.

And now the lightning round . . .

Ewan McGregor or Jude Law

I have no idea who this “Ewan” is.  I think I have seen Jude Law before?  I don’t remember being repulsed?

Yet, my eyes remain true to my non-cross-dressing Lumberjack:

 

Coke or Pepsi

Diet Pepsi, of course.
Cupcake or slice of pie
Apple pie or pumpkin pie

Neither.  I am a health nut.  Remember?
New or old version of Willy Wonka

Old
Capris or shorts

Capris.  Remember these bad boys?

The public thanks me.
right or left handed

Right.
Umbrella or poncho

Umbrella
beach or mountains

Beach
tomato or potato

Potato

From Tara:

And my Q for you: When was the last time you ate MOOSE TRACKS?? Was it THE Mother’s Day outing? I’m on my Oreo kick right now because the last 1/2 gallon of MOOSE TRACKS I ate had very little fudge swirl in it and made me want to write to the ice cream makers for it.

I had Moose Tracks on Sunday at the Amusement Park.  And I could not even finish it, the disappointment that I am.

Moose Tracks from the grocery store is no good.  But $4 waffle cone from a parlor is where its at.  I like the finer things in life.

From Katie:

What is your recipe for chicken/potato/artichoke dish?

I got this recipe from Shannon when I asked you all for simple dinner recipes:

Artichoke Chicken

1 can of artichoke hearts (or 1/3 of a Costco jar)
1 pound of chicken tenders cut into chunks (I use 12)
1 bag of small red potatoes (sliced)
2 cloves of garlic
juice of one lemon
2 TBSP olive oil
salt & pepper to taste

This meal is supper simple. I bake my potatoes in the microwave until just done. Cook chicken. In a large skillet combine cooked, diced chicken, potatoes, artichokes, olive oil, garlic & lemon. Saute until potatoes are a nice golden brown. Season with salt & pepper to taste. Delightful!

Yes.  Shannon originally wrote “supper” simple, instead of “super” simple and I found it to be a snazzy typo.

From Wendy:

Let me see…do you plan to home school all of your kids until they graduate? Or just until you go stark-raving mad?

I have NO idea.

But Daisy Mae will oft ask if we can do homeschool college, so I fear I am in it for the long haul.
Does the Lumberjack plan to live in Ruralville for the rest of his life? Or will you move back to civilization?

He told me on day one that he would love to die here.  Which was an odd thing to say, but, this is his dream and we cannot fault him for that, even if we cannot understand it.

From Jessy H:

Ok, my questions
1.) So, I follow 6 blogs. Why is it, that 4 or 5 of those 6 decide to takes breaks at the same time? Do they not realize that I read them and only them and they shouldn’t all leave me at the same time!? Do they not realize that I stay home with no adult interaction through-out the day and reading them is how I feel like I am surrounded by adults?

No.  I do not think they realize.  My sympathies.
2.) I also am turning 30 this year and have not yet had the facial hair problem. Is this really something that is going to happen to me? When did you (oops, your friend) start seeing the facial hair?

I don’t have facial hair, so I don’t know what you are talking about.  I am flawless.

From Rachel:

 I also have a question for you. Despite loving your lumberjack, lumberjacklings, and lumberjillings and enjoying (?) your country-living lifestyle I feel I may safely assume this is not the life you dreamed of. So when you were a young lass what did you think your life would be like when you were 30?

NO!  Yet here I am.  It is my lot in life, my burden to bear.

From Joyce

Here is my question-does the LJ know he’s pushing his luck with the handlebar thing?

Let me let you all in on a little secret:  I can’t let LJ know when he is pushing my buttons.  It will not end well for me.

When we were first married, my romantic and doting husband used to pin me down on the ground and restrain my arms.  Then he would proceed to slowly let a . . .  how do you say it . . . loogie?, drop from his lips, dangle in front of my nose, and then he would suck it back up.

Hands off, ladies.  He is all mine.

Well, I would scream and kick and buck and yell and fake cry and try all sorts of things to get him to stop.  This only encourages him.

It was when I feigned indifference that he finally stopped.

Therefore and henceforth, I shall shrug and say “Whatever you want, hon” when he mentions the handlebars.  As long as I remain steadfast in this lie, he will not get handlebars.

I hope.

From Suzanne:

How in the world do you stay sane and positive living in ruralville? I’m from a beautiful coastal town in Florida that I miss every. single. day. and I now live in S. Alabama (SIIIIGGGGGHHHHH) and I have a very hard time staying sane and positive living here. On top of that, I don’t have nearly as much on my plate as you do-I have no kids so obviously I don’t homeschool. HOW do you do it?!

I have no idea.

Just kidding.  Well, life isn’t THAT bad for me.  God has blessed me and I am thankful for this house and all the land we have now.  I do love homeschooling my children, as challenging as it is.  I have a husband who loves me and takes care of us who doesn’t have handlebars and stopped spitting loogies on me. 

Moving here meant a lot to my husband.  He is very appreciative of my willingness to do so and he is happier, so I am happier.

***

Thanks for all the questions, you all rocked my world.

Tonight I am going on a farewell tour with my children’s ministry peeps.

Yes.  None of you probably knew this because I rarely speak of such things, but I was in leadership for children’s ministry for 6 years and I just stepped down.

They are all devastated, I can assure you.

Here we all are. 

Yes.  We look awesome, this cannot be helped.

No!  I am not completely stepping down.

David and I shall be serving in an elementary aged room from here on out.

Don’t tell David, but I signed him up to lead worship on stage.  It’s right up his alley.

Happy Tuesday!