Today is the day of my husband’s birth. I won’t tell you how OLD he is now, because I wouldn’t want him to get all depressed and forlorn about his age and all. I still think of us as dumb 20 year olds who don’t know what we are doing.
Alas. We are not 20. But we are still dumb and have no clue what we are doing. Plus we now have four kids.
I was having dinner at my parent’s house one evening recently whilst David was working late. I told my dad that David wanted coveralls for his birthday.
You remember the coveralls, don’t you, dear readers?
Anyways. I was telling my dad that this was what my husband desired for the celebration of his birth.
I trust you remember my dad, no?
My dad, who rarely utters a syllable, dropped his fork and slammed the table.
Dad: No!
Me: What?!
Dad: You must not buy him these coveralls.
Me (laughing, because my dad has always been a slave to fashion): What do you care?!
Dad: David is taking this country life thing too far, Taylor. It’s too much! You must put a stop to this!
Me: Well, he just wants them because-
Dad (interrupting, because he is the patriarch and it is his right to do so): Let me tell you a story.
This may shock you, dear readers, but my dad isn’t exactly known for his story-telling skills. Or skillz. Whichever tootles your horn.
Before this intriguing story begins, the reader must be informed that in days of yore, my dad delivered oxygen-ish stuff to people in need of such items.
Dad: Back when I had my route, there was this guy I had to deliver to. He wore such coveralls.
Me: So?
Dad: They were really awful.
Me: Ok.
Dad: So, one day, I go to his house for a delivery. I knock on the door and he answers wearing nothing but white socks.
Me: Nothing?
Dad: Nothing.
Me: Awkward.
Dad: So, he lets me in and says, “Sorry! I thought you were that other guy!”
Me: Ew.
Dad: WHAT OTHER GUY? Who was he waiting naked for? He was a weird guy. And every other time I saw him, he was wearing coveralls. So, David cannot get coveralls. It’s just too much.
Me: Alright, Dad.
But, I digress.
I still bought David the coveralls, because it is what his heart desires. And what do I care anymore? He doesn’t read this stupid blog, so we don’t need to worry about him finding out before he opens them.
The coveralls I purchased look similar to these ones:
Except the ones I bought are a lighter blue with white stripes and look almost as if he is about to conduct a train.
Choo. Choo.
I am also making my husband his favorite cake. It is also the favorite, go-to cake for all of my crazy-kin inlaws.
Are you ready for it?
Take a yellow cake mix.
Prepare it.
Bake it.
Take a knife and just slaughter the top of it.
Take a package of pudding mix.
Prepare it.
Pour it over the top of the cake and let it set in the cake.
Refrigerate.
Spread with Cool Whip.
Ta. Da.
Make this cake and your husband, if he is a Maliblahblah, will rise and call you blessed.
No!
Do not fool yourself and try a fancy new recipe! Do not pore over cookbooks and pick out fancy cakes you feel shall impress your main man!
Just stick with the pudding cake! It is all he will ever want.
Ever.
Alright. That is all. Goodbye.
PS-He is 31
I want to know who the other guys was and why is “coverall” guy nakid waiting on him?
Washing machine repair man maybe??
Yeah. You married a fashionable hottie who probably pretended to like new foods just o impress you.
Now you’ve got a guy in coveralls who eats pudding cake.
That sums up marriage pretty nicely actually. Mine is pretty much the same.
officially *liking* this brilliant comment!!
perhaps he was waiting for the coverall repairman.
You always make me laugh out loud….you and that picture of your dad!
Happy Birthday Coverall Man! Choo Choo! (choo choo is the new holla) 😉
Great story about your dad and the naked guy. The pudding cake sounds kinda good.
Happy Birthday, Mr. Lumberjack! 🙂
Maybe the ‘other guy’ was the ‘Ugly Naked Guy,’ of Friends origin, huh?
Happy Birthday Lumberjack! Your dad’s story is HILARIOUS, by the way. You’ll just have to make sure your lumberjack removes his socks first. Hee hee ha ha!! 🙂 I’ll stop there.
Your dad’s story made me laugh out loud… I needed that… Who is this “other guy”???
I was waiting on the edge of my seat for applesauce on top of the Cool Whip. Or maybe under it. Either way, you disappointed me.
Happy Birthday, Lumberjactrician!
P.S. Your dad’s story? Ewww.
I hope that your dad was telling you that story in the absence of little ears! Because that mental picture could have scarred them for years!
My brother was raving about a similiar pudding cake this weekend. My sis-in-law substituted pudding for the milk in a boxed cake. He could hardly contain himself just describing it. Guess I need to try it. I really thought there would be some huckleberries in that cake you were describing.
Mindee’s got it right on. That what marriage is…coveralls and pudding cake. And thank goodness. 🙂
this is hilarious. I loved every word. Seriously. You have a gift my friend.
I hope your boys mistake your husband for a train conductor. That would be awesomeness..
You have no idea how I needed this laugh today! Your dad rocks!
Happy Birthday to Mr. Lumberjack ~ but since he doesn’t read “this stupid blog” never mind. 🙂 I had to laugh at you saying that because that’s EXACTLY how my husband views blogs, facebook and any other social networking. He would NEVER social or network if it was up to him. I love him anywho. 🙂 GREAT story from your Dad! And yes, I too laugh every time I see that picture!
I am having trouble getting past the naked man answering the door for your dad.
Happy Birthday to your hubs!
I am going to have to make that pudding cake! I’m sure my family would just LOVE it! It may ruin this little thing I’m on called a “diet” though. Ugh :/
LJW, you are a good wife. Not just good, you are the bomb. He ought to call you Blessed every moment of your life, since you are living his dream. But pudding cake never hurt anything. I am assuming you use a chocolate pudding?
we missed you while you were stuck there in the 20th century for a while. glad to have you back!
LJ’s favorite cake reminds me of one my mom made to fave reviews. Prepare same yellow cake per directions in a 9 x 13 pan. Pull out of oven, cool somewhat then take a carving fork and poke holes. Pour prepared jello over top then put in refridge till jello coagulates like blood…..good times.
Actually, my hubby’s fav is prepare a chocolate cake per directions, pour into a greased bundt cake pan….bake, remove from pan, stick in refridge….do not even THINK about putting frosting of any kind on top……then he can cut a slice every time he goes by…..that’s it. By the way, hubby is a trained chef and this is the most DELICIOUS THING EVER.
Your blog isn’t stupid. And that cake sounds darn good! So how many WW points do y’all think a slice might be? I vote for 3.
Totally cracking up at your dad’s “other guy” story!
And the cake is yum. I know this from firsthand experience because I have eaten half of one at a time (not proud of it). Only Betty Crocker calls it an “Out Of This World Cake” – and dumps a can of pineapple on top of the slaughtered yellow cake, then adds the pudding mixed with cream cheese and REAL vanilla, then cool whip, and sprinkled with coconut. Why do they print these things on the outside of the cake box? Why do they do that to my thighs? Why Why Why?
Cuz I go all handsome on those recipes, and it’s not pretty.
Happy late birthday to the train conductor!