Like you care.

My friend, Shelly, was attempting to get some decent shots of my kids for me this week.

Cue Little Dude and his secret, inner desire to be a supermodel . . .

Apparently Little Dude likes to pose.

No one was asking him to . . . he was just feeling it, you know?

Is he showing off his bum?  We cannot be certain.

Shelly asked him to sit on the chair.  It was a vain attempt to get him to stop showing his bum.

“Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?”

(Name that movie.)

Well.  He is cute.  I’ll give him that.

Yes!  My son does have water all down the front of his shirt.  I’m glad you noticed.  And, yes!  He is wearing two left cowboy boots.  It’s his trademark.

Every time we are in public, I look upon my son in dismay as I realize that, yes, he has once again chosen the two left cowboy boots.  Per usual.

One of these days I’m gonna march over to that shoe basket and remove one of those pairs of boots.  Someday.

Let’s do a COW.

For it pleases us.

This week’s goes to my very own Auntie Datenut.

I normally do not believe in corporal punishment, mostly because it doesn’t work usually and makes parents feel worse. But I WOULD seriously HURT the person breaking the eyeglasses. Additionally, like you care, but there are frames that bend not break and I have always wondered why you don’t get them like 1800 years ago?????!!!

Ohmygoodnessgracious.  That comment killed me.  KILLED me.  More specifically, the part where she writes, “like you care.”

So, now, dear readers, I will give you:

The Glasses Story (like you care)

(did you see what I did just there?)

Once upon a time, I had a baby boy.  He was uber handsome and precious.  But, alas.  The boy’s eyes were not working proper-like.

So the baby boy had to get glasses at the age of 6 months.

Please take note of the walls in my former house.

See how they are NOT PEACH.  That’s key.

Baby Handsome Dude would not keep glasses on.  It was impossible.  Have you ever tried to reason with a baby?

But as the boy grew, we were able to get him to wear them more.  But he wasn’t the most gentle with the glasses.

We have gone to the same optical place since Sweet Pea was two.  They are always very kind to me and fix the glasses for free and always try to give me a discount or help me out in some way.

For this they know to be truth:  I cannot keep glasses on the boy.  And they pity me.

Last May, I took Handsome Dude to a new eye doctor who completely changed his prescription and made it much stronger.  Poor Handsome Dude’s eyes were not doing well at all.  He was having double vision and his eye was constantly wandering.  But since he got his new prescription, Handsome Dude is very careful with his glasses now.  He hates not wearing them.  I think its because he can actually see now.

I had considered the more flexible frames, but the awesome peeps at the optical place were able to save me money by just ordering new lenses for his existing frames.  These frames have broken 1.2 million times, but they kept saying they are under warranty and order new ones.  For free!

But the warranty is up.  Which is why my husband had to torch the frames to mold them into submission.

Handsome Dude has two other pairs of glasses.  The astute reader might remember me talking about how my husband bought some INDESTRUCTIBLE glasses from a different optical place.  Traitor.

We were told these frames would bend, not break.

They break.

Plus, Handsome Dude’s lenses are too thick for these frames and the lenses are always popping out.  Which is not his fault at all.

But the frames breaking?  That would be the work of this guy:

So, there you go.  And his prescription might change again this spring, so we are trying to hold off on buying new ones until after that doctor’s appointment.

Hence the blowtorch.

But, rest assured, we will be ordering more durable frames.  In fact, the optical place (MY optical place) already has some ordered for him to try on.

Alright.  I must go do my chores and whatnot.

But first, I must share the convo I heard between the dudes this morning before they were getting in the bath.

They were both naked.  FYI.

Little Dude:  Hey!  Hey, you!

Handsome Dude:  What!

Little Dude:  Come and get me!   Come and get me cowboy!

Handsome Dude:  O-Tay, cowboy!

And the two naked cowboys chased each other around the house.

As per their usual custom.