Alex and Holly were in town last weekend.
Do you know who Alex and Holly are? Are you confused?
You are not alone.
It is the first time we have seen them since we became chicken entrepreneurs. Alex asked if he could buy a dozen eggs from us.
He looked at them.
Alex: Whaaaaat? Did you dye them?
Me: Yes.
Alex: Really?
Me: It is an extra service I throw in. If you want plain eggs, it is $2 a dozen. If you get the pretty Easter eggs, we charge $2.50 a dozen.
Alex: Oh . . . .but these are already dyed so I have to buy dyed?
Me: Looks like it.
Oh, man. I kill me.
Lest any of you are left confused and bewildered, no, I do not dye eggs. Different chicken breeds lay different egg colors. And we have a plethora of chicken breeds.
Please. Try to keep up.
Oh! And Alex is David’s brother. He is best known for all of his wild shenanigans.
Like torturing my children.
And stealing Daisy Mae’s vest to get around an inconvenient, “No Shirt, No Service Rule” when he had a hankering for ice cream.
But, I digress.
Carrots!
We now have carrots from our garden.
Be excited.
Also, I have been meaning to show you this new canned chicken photo. Because I am always so popular when I post the picture of the canned chicken.
You thought I was going to post the old, horrific photo, didn’t you? DIDN’T YOU?
Nope. I have a new one.
Chicken Noodle Soup.
Or, as I like to call it:
“Dinner for when Taylor is not home and David is in charge.”
Why did it turn orange?
Why?
WHY?
So. We had a bit of stress this week. We had renters leaving Thursday morning and new renters coming Thursday afternoon. I knew about this a couple of months ago, so I recruited my mother to take the day off from work to watch my cherubs and my sister in law, Amy, said she would come to the house and help me.
David cannot take a Thursday off in AUGUST! That is crazy-talk.
Earlier this week, I started to feel sick. Like, I knew I needed to go the doctor, sick. But my husband is on some crazy schedule of leaving around 5am and coming home between 8 and 10pm, and I had no desire to load the aforementioned “cherubs” up and drive the 45 minutes to the doctor.
However!
I knew that Thursday was my crazy rental cleaning day and I needed to be up to par for that. I won’t go into details, because it might make me blush, but it was something that an antibiotic would clear up pretty quickly.
Around 5pm, I decided to rest for a bit and see how I felt the next morning, when lo and behold, David, my husband, called me.
Yes! He CALLED me! Before 8pm!
David: You still feeling sick?
Me: Yeah.
David: Alright. I will be home in an hour. I am taking you to the doctor.
That’s right, folks. MY husband, David Maliblahblah, was quitting work at the slothful hour of 5pm, to drive all the way home, load us up, and drive all the way back to where he was just working to take me to the doctor.
And I didn’t even ask.
I became terrified. What if I was not really sick with what I thought I was sick with? What if my extremely exhausted husband had to drive all around the world, only for me to hear the doctor say that I was fine?
Oh, the horror.
I am happy to report that I was infected with what I thought was ailing me.
And the kids all cheered for “Daddy’s Dinner,” which was Frostys and Fries from Wendy’s.
So. That was Tuesday night.
Wednesday, I still felt sickly, but was on the mend.
Thursday was the dreaded cleaning day.
My parents just put their house on the market this week and their house is the cleanest house in the world. No joke.
So, I had to warn the cherubs to not make a mess. Because, have you met them?
I got to the house before Amy and lo, and behold, the washing machine was broken. David had gotten to the house before me to start a load and noticed it was not working. He took it all apart and removed items such as: a box of floss, coins, and hair clips. He thought he got it working again, but, alas, it was making strange noises and no longer draining.
I called David and he asked if Amy and I would be up to buying a new washing machine.
?
Because apparently we look THAT muscular.
Amy, that dearheart that she is, took all the bedding and towels to the laundromat and I stayed behind to clean the house.
While Amy was washing laundry and making friends at the laundromat, I was receiving calls from my girls to inform me that Little Dude was being extremely naughty for his Grams and could I please talk to him?
Me: Dude. Are you being naughty?
LD: Hi, Mom!
Me: Are you being naughty?
LD: Nope! I’m a good boy!
Me: I want you to listen to Grams for m-
And he hung up on me.
But did I have time to deal with that boy? No. No I did not.
I had to start the lawnmower.
Oh, yes.
I, yes, I, Taylor Maliblahblah, started the lawnmower all by myself.
True.
It took me a good ten minutes and I had to use ALL of my muscles. But I did it!
I am happy to report that Amy and I got the house all cleaned up by 3pm. David somehow managed to get a new washing machine in there before 5pm and the renters were none the wiser.
We are like the Rental House Dream Team, are we not?
Oh! And if anyone wants to buy a cute house that rents well in Downtown Wherever We Live, let me know!
Later, dudes.
Thanks for the giggles this morning! Bless your husband. My husband has been around a few failing marriages lately, and like your hubby, he is trying to be extra attentive to some details that are helpful …like NOT working to the extreme hours when he can get out of it at all. And his boss encourages this because his boss is one of those going through marital issues. You are impressive with the rental vacay home!
Wait They are selling there house?
HAHAHA! Little Dude is ace!
Perhaps we should add Rental Manager Extraordinaire to your title? :o)
i know all your secrets
I’m a city girl but I would not have fallen for the Easter Egg scam. Hope you’re feeling better!
I think I’ve just figured out why canned food comes in cans at the grocery store and not transparent jars. Canned food does not look very appealing, especially when it contains meat and/or meat juice. Your food is probably delicious, just try not to look at it before you pour it into the pot. And, I think you are very brave for all of the things you do, such as collecting eggs from chickens. Today I was feeling very un-brave when I quarantined one of our bathrooms, because a large spider was hiding in there. I hope my husband finds it and “takes care of it” when he gets home. In some ways, I don’t feel cut out for living here. But, I am encouraged that at least I do not have to fetch eggs from chickens.
<3 <3 <3
A salesman you are not. I think you may be stuck with the rental.
But that egg story was pretty stinking funny.
And don’t you wish you could have put a sample in one of your sterile canning jars, had him drop it off at the doctor, then just bring home an antibiotic?
That is, if the blushing topic is what my nurse brain jumped to!
Totally crackin’ up over the egg story. Tooooo funny! My parents own rental properties, ’tis not for the faint hearted…
I know exactly what your chicken soup needs. LABELS. I also kill myself. Too bad you had to do all that work whilst ill. I hope you two can swing it cuz that place is a goldmine and your kids can do more helping as they get older.
Yes, the kids can be more help as they get older, but there is a problem. Once children are old enough to become useful, they tend to develop their own lives so they’re still not around when you need them!
Carrots! HA You really ARE the Rental Dream Team. Think you could hop a flight over to the East Coast and help out here???
So when you want to dye easter eggs this upcoming spring (forget the winter in between for a second), do you go buy them or are you going to use the ones from your chickens because I want to know what happens when you try to dye a brown egg!
Please! I am all curious!
Glad you started feeling better and hope you feel like yourself again!
I caught the bug too. I am miserable as well. We used to have chickens that layed Easter eggs too! It was a lot of fun selling the eggs but poor Dad did all of the work with the chickens.
I so love your Posts, thank you for all the Smiles and many Laughters you have given me : )