The Thursday Night Post

The other day at work, a coworker was mentioning how she had stressed out her husband, who was at home, by asking him to quickly bring something inside from out of the rain.

Coworker:  Seriously.  It would have taken him two minutes.

Me:  Well, he should have David has his “spouse.”

I know.  It didn’t make any sense.  But listen to what I had to do once during my prep time while working from home.

David texts me and asks me if I could please give the steers water.  And I am Pro-Keep-Livestock-Alive, so I agreed.

So, I trudged out there.  And the hose was frozen.  So I knew from watching David that I would have to bring it into the house to warm by the fire.  So I had to unhook it and haul it to the basement, only to find the fire had gone dead.

So, then I had to build a fire, but of course, we didn’t have kindling, so I had to go gather some, because you all know I won’t be using an ax.

As if.

So, I built a fire and had to wait for the hose to thaw and take it outside and fill the water.  And that took up my precious prep time so I had to work through lunch.

The things I do for this man.  Marriage is a sacrifice.

***

Martin Luther King Junior Day came and went.  I have always had a hard time introducing this topic to six year olds, because, in many ways, it feels like I am “introducing” the idea of inequality and racism to them.  And I am not sure how I feel about that.  The “introducing” part, not the teaching them about it.  They are just so innocent and sweet and I try to be so careful.

We read some books about MLK Jr and talked about the word equality.

It opened up a precious conversation with my firsties.  Have I mentioned I love them?

Precious Firstie:  I have a connection to that story.

Me:  What’s that?

Precious Firstie (who has a speech delay):  One time, another kid told me I talked dumb.  And that I didn’t sound “American.”  And that I should not be here in this country.

So that opened up some chatting and we talked about how it is so important to learn The Golden Rule and treat other people the way you would want to be treated.

Precious Firstie:  The best part was he told me I was going to be in trouble for being in this country, so he tried to tattle on me.  And then he got in trouble for being mean to me!

***

We need to talk about this morning.  Because it was a doozy.

Allow me to set the scene:

Kate and Hadley had stayed the night at my parents’ house because they had a late basketball game.

The boys and I had to leave the house by 6:35am to get them to school on time.

Let’s begin.

When David was getting up for work, the puppies heard him and wanted to start their day.

David is soooo cute with the puppies.  Except he only talks all cute to them when he thinks no one can hear them.

But, Reader.  I can hear him.

David (very sing-songy and lovey)  Come on boys!  Let’s go!  Let’s go outside!

Tails wagging, life is happy.

After I woke up, I opted to leave the crazy puppies outside while I cleaned up the house and packed lunches and the like.

And have I told you our dishwasher is broken?

Reader.  Our dishwasher is broken.  It has been broken for awhile.  We are having appliance stress.  That will be a topic for another day.

I wake the boys up, and we have the same routine that we have had with LD since the beginning of time.

Wake up, wake up, wake up.

Come upstairs, come upstairs, come upstairs.

Do not lay on the couch.

Get in the shower.

Use soap in the shower.

Get out of the shower.

Get dressed, get dressed, get dressed.

Why are you wearing those pants?  They do not fit you.  Try again.

Come upstairs, come upstairs, come upstairs.

Eat breakfast.

Why aren’t you eating breakfast?

Here.  Eat.  I have made you breakfast.

And so on and so forth.

While I am enjoying ALL OF THAT, I get a text from Kate.

Kate:  Mom.  I think I have a concussion and I need you to bring me my glasses to work.

This is fine, but we will have to leave a bit earlier.

And that is not fine.

Then Hadley texts me.

Mom:  Can you bring me this sweatshirt and that sweatshirt and this pair of pants and my boots?

This is fine, but we will have to leave a bit earlier.

And that is not possible.  Because I am only on the third reminder to LD to get out of the shower.  And he needs seven.

We let the puppy brothers in and they are covered in something.  I am not sure what it was, but this is what I can tell you:
It was brown/black.  It smelled like poop, pee, and the gut pile.

So, we had to give the puppy brothers a bath, it had to be done.  And we were running late.  And we had to give Kate her glasses, and I knew we were definitely going to be late, so I called the school and told the kind secretary:

“Hello!  Yes, the boys will be late.  Our puppies got into a gut pile and they had to have a bath!  Sorry.”

Because that’s what everyone wants to hear at 7:45 in the morning.

Moments later, I get a call from Hadley.  She cannot find the keys to her car.  So I drop the boys off, late, at school, and go to collect Hadley.

And I call the school and tell the kind secretary:

“Yes, Hello!  Me again!  Hadley has lost her keys so she will be late as I need to now pick her up.”

I get Hadley.  We have deep fellowship about the keys and I interrogate her and she was like:

“Gosh, geez, Mom.  I don’t know.  Gosh.  Yes, I looked through all my bags.”

So I dropped her off, late, at school, and went back to my parents house to look for the keys.  And I could not find them.

Reader.  They were with her.  In her school backpack.

***

Hadley likes a boy.  The boy might like Hadley.

Hadley:  He asked me to hang out tomorrow, but he doesn’t know what to do, so he suggested he just picks me up in his truck and we drive around for awhile.

David (in the most high pitched voice you could ever imagine on a man): NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

***

Happy Thursday.