Well.
I am not sure if any of you have noticed or not, but my Internet presence has been somewhat scarce over the past few days.
That is because our Internet Service is lame.
And is charging us outrageous amounts of dollars.
Lame.
And we have to cancel it.
Which will cost more insane amounts of dollars.
Lamer.
So. It goes away at midnight tonight.
When will we get new Internet Service?
I cannot be certain.
It all depends on the gazelle-like swiftness of my Lumberjack (who will be acting as an electrician) as he prowls about town during the weekdays.
Godspeed, Lumberjack.
Godspeed.
***
In other news . . . a few of you thought maybe my lagoon of human waste matter might be illegal.
Could it be?
That would be a bummer. And then we might have to move. Which may or may not be a bad thing.
I am still thinking about it.
But our realtor who sold us this blessed land is coming over for dinner tomorrow night. So, if it is illegal, perhaps I shall throw food at him. Or poison him.
Or just cook how I normally cook and kill him with blandness.
Is it a bad sign that they offered to bring pizza so I wouldn’t have to cook?
Thoughts?
***
I gave the boys haircuts tonight.
We’ll just leave it at that.
***
I made my own laundry soap and fabric softener this weekend.
And now I am curious if one can make their own dish soap?
What is happening to me?
Somebody send out a rescue mission immediately.
***
And now, since I can’t talk to you all in awhile, I am just going to vomit meaningless information at you.
You’re welcome.
1. It might snow tomorrow.
2. LucyFur chased scores of turkeys around the plantation today.
3. I tasted elk.
4. I am still alive.
5. Barely.
6. How many times a week ought a person leave their home? What is and is not healthy?
7. My Internet service is lame.
8. I am still reading Horton Hatches the Egg at least two times a day.
9. Praise report! The elk that the Lumberjack shot, and we are now using as daily sustenance, did not have impressive antlers and shall not be hanging above my bed!
10. Did you know I am almost 30? This discourages me.
That’s it!
Farewell!
Happy Lame Monday!
Oh my friendy friend!
Sounds like LucyFur is trying to help out with the Thanksgiving dinner. I think twice a week is healthy to leave your house. Sometimes I leave my house and drive around the block just to get a break. Since you do not really have blocks out there in Ruralville, I am sure around the pond would do. Waiting to see those great pics of the boys haircuts. Here is a recipe for homemade dish soap, just in case.
Lavender Dish Soap
2 ups soap flakes (grated ivory)
1 gallon water
25 drops of lavender essential oil (you can change this to lemon or orange or other scent)
Place soap flakes and water into a pan. Heat over medium heat stirring occasionally until it boils and until soap dissolves. Lower heat and simmer for 10 minutes to thoroughly combine the ingredients. Remove from heat and let liquid partially cool, add the essential oil and stir. Pour into a clean plastic squeeze bottle or re-used dish soap bottle.
Mix the washing soda and the borax and store in a plastic covered container. To use, add 2 tablespoons to the dishwasher soap compartment.
LOL! Only the wife of a true redneck would have to thank the Lord that the elk’s rack was not big enough for display! Though to be fair, I annoy my husband with my annual tradition of bedecking the horns with glass ball ornaments hanging from girly ribbon… Think it’s enough payback for the fact that I have to walk in the dead center of the room or risk impalement? 🙂
Wishing you speedy re-internet!
I, too, wish you a hasty return of the internet connection!
And if someone offers to bring you pizza, say yes! Are you nuts? Also, use paper plates. No dishes!
🙂
I’m sure your cooking is way better than store bought pizza.
I did notice the scarcity of your presence online.
I was wondering if one of those deadly snakes got to you.
Alas, it was only that snake of an internet company.
They can be sinister, too.
Tell LJ to get it fixed quick!
If you’re not leaving the house, you need to at least get out into the virtual world.
I am willing to bet money it is a satellite company. We paid an insane amount of money to get rid of a satellite internet company as well. They are big fat liars and money stealers…and they don’t give you internet when they say they will.
Many happy returns!
Oh dear. I think I might cope better with the ‘lagoon’ on my property than the prospect of no internet!
And look at you making your own soaps. Very Little House on the Prairie.
If your internet is not restored quickly I would think a field trip to the library would be in order…it would check a lot of boxes…homeschooling-check
getting out of the house-check
LJill accessing the internet while her very well behaved children sit quietly engrossed in books-check?
But . . . but . . . but . . . Taylor! You MUST have internet. You’ve lost Target, coffee shops, meeting friends for lunch, sending your kids to school – you can’t lose internet too. Stop the madness!
Perhaps LJ could sell the wood he fell?
*Like*
No internet? Say it’s not so! It’s said the Lord never gives us more than we can handle. He may be crossing the line here. If we don’t hear from you in two days, all your blog friends are coming out to never never land to sit with you by the lagoon and just listen to you vomit your randomness. I’ll bring the pizza.
May God send you speedy internet, my friend! And soon! Though, I am afraid that you may be going over the edge with the making detergent and whatnot. Hermithood is a slippery slope! 🙂
Do they have libraries with internet in ruralville within a reasonable driving distance from your blessed land? Speedy reentry wishes to you.
I agree with Christina – I’d say “yes” to an offer of pizza over cooking anytime. No judging here 😉
I would think that making your own soap/fabric softener ought to somewhat balance out the price of that internet. Remind LJ that in the interest of safety for the kids, it’s better if you remain somewhat sane, and therefore you should be able to contact the outside world.
Glad there are no elk mounts over your bed. Been there done that with the mount in the bedroom thing. Didn’t care for it. : )
Your friends know that you are trapped in Ruralville and are bringing you a taste of the Big City as a treat. And a respite from elk!
I will be as sad as sad can be to not be able visit you virtually for a while. Come back soon! Godspeed to the Gazelle like Lumberjack!
I have to recommend a book for making your own cleaning products
Green Clean by Linda Mason Hunter. The pages are even waterproof so I keep it in my cleaning supplies cabinet with no worry for wear and tear.
Hopefully Ruralville has a public library nearby because I always recommend they get in a book that I want, but don’t want to buy. (Yay for them having books about MSPI diets when my second baby had Milk Soy Protein Intolerance.)
No internet! I would die. Come back soon. please. I’m begging. 🙂
Good luck with restoring not-so-lame Internet Service. You’ll probably be all kinds of resourceful with your “unplugged” time. I totally want to make my own soap. Duggar-style. Except I’m too lazy which totally defeats the purpose of handmade items. So I’ll stick with Tide. For now. 🙂
Mindy
http://www.thesuburbanlife.com
No internet?! Gasp!!!
Way to go making your own soaps and whatnot! Awesome!
Also, there was snow in my forecast this morning too, but it did not happen. Boo. (does this mean you might live near me?!–haha!) I like snow, because even tho I CAN leave the house, and it’s really no big deal, it gives me an excuse to NOT leave the house. I try to leave the house NO MORE THAN 2 times a week. Every time I leave the house I end up spending money, so that keeps it under control. 🙂
Godspeed LJ!
I’m sure the offer to bring pizza had absolutely nothing to do with your cooking skillz. (see that? the “z”?…that was for you) Just enjoy the delicious italian pie and leave it at that. 🙂
I wanted to make my own dish soap the other day because I was out and I had pots and pans galore. It looked like Cinderella had taken the month off. Let me know if it can be done.
Please do not say the word snow. I live entirely too close to you for that to be allowed. Ewww.
We will miss you…please hurry back!
oh no! This makes me sad for you on so many levels. I am not on the internet much lately either. Sad. Sad sad sad. We will lose track of what is going on with each other, and when we re-convine you will be 30 and I will still not know how to make soap.
Praise for the Praise Report!
Maybe you could throw Horton and his egg into the lagoon. I will have to go back and read what the WHAT that is all about.
I wish you a speedy and relatively inexpensive return to the worldwide web. In the meantime it sounds as though you are becoming a true homesteader! I congratulate you on that! I make my own laundry detergent as well! Easy!
If you’d like any more info on homesteading issues, go to http://www.homesteadingtoday.com, those folks’d be glad to help you out. 🙂
I’m sorry, maybe I’m mistaken, but I thought this blog belonged to to Taylor Mali-blah-blah, the city girl who likes coffee from the yummy little place downtown and jewelry from the awesome jewelry store just down the block from that. NOT the home-schooling-makes-her-own-soap-and-detergent-girl-without-internet. Ha! Just kidding. I still love you. But really, are you feeling okay? If the next time I see you you are wearing a denim jumper, I may hurt you. I draw the line there. 🙂 Will miss you here in internet world. Please come back soon! PLEASE!!! I need you!! xoxo, Sweet Sugar Pants MindyLou
Oh Taylor….I will miss our virtual friendship…please hurry back!!
I’m with everyone else! Hurry Back!
How sad! And I got on here specifically to say
that I have tried out the centering trick.
And it flows really well when you are sleep-deprived,
and can only think in short blips.
And it looks nice.
Come back soon!
Sad. I have the internet but currently have no access to my e-mail as I have been hacked and the e-mail people have informed me that I am apparently not me so I can’t have access to my e-mail again. GRRRR. This caused a frantic call to my adoption worker demanding he not send the impending (any day!) referral to said e-mail address. Too bad all my bills are connected to my e-mail and I am apparently not smart enough to keep track of all my people’s e-mail addresses in any other place other than in said e-mail account. Technology – it’s wonderful and yet making me insane.
I hope you get internet again soon, love your blog!
Okay, I’m too tired to read all of these comments, but just in case nobody said: I think that if it is runoff from your showers and washer, it is fine. This is gray water. However, if your septic is not filtering your true “waste” (black water) then indeed, it is not supposed to come to the surface. Ever.
At least, that’s what I think I know.
Which isn’t saying much.
I like being in the city – close to everything. Sometimes I stay home two days in a row but only when I’m really absorbed in a project/hobby. But otherwise I gotta get out every day. Let them bring pizza, make a salad and dessert. However, now I couldn’t live without internet as I use it all day. I don’t even want to know what’s in your lagoon. Icky. But I just don’t want anyone to fall in. I’ll go nuts without your blog so do what you can do please. You’re my favoritest ever.
Hurry back! Tell Mr. Lumberjack he will be doing a public service to get you back on the internet. Your blog provides valuable humor breaks when, speaking for myself, my hair is on the verge of being pulled out with rambunctious children running amuck.
Maybe those Realtors offered pizza as a preemptive strike against the elk meat?
SOOOOOOO jealous you go an elk! Seriously, of all the game meat, they are one of the best! Buffalo is my first fav., then elk! AWESOME steaks. And amazing jerky. And ground beef. We lived for 2 years off one.. and bless my hubbys heart… he has not shot one in a while. 🙁
Sorry bout internet. THAT IS A BUMMER. 🙁
No, no, no, absolutely no. You cannot cancel the internet. I am WAY older than you and Mr. Lumberjack, and if we lived in another country, like India, he would have to do what I say. I say you HAVE to have internet. 🙂 Doesn’t he know we need to know if your kids EVER stop peeing on the dryer, or if they ever learn to all smile at the same time for a picture, or what you are going to do with the Brown Lagoon? Your readers voted, and you are outnumbered! 🙂 All kidding aside, I am praying for a solution. As a SAHM, I have found internet vital to my sanity and my spiritual encouragement. Praying, praying, praying.