Sigh and Hope for Better Days.

Life is busy! I have no time to post, nor do I have anything of substance to say.

Nothing of substance!  You may ask, “Taylor!  How is that different than any other post you write?”

Well, dear readers.  It’s not.

Yet, post I shall!

We are leaving in one week to go on a mini-trip to see my cousin get married.  Sweet Pea and Daisy Mae are flower girls.  Do you know what this means?

I am in charge of beautifying them.

Quick!  How shall I do their hair?  Oh, for the stress. 

There seems to be much confusion on this here blog as to which daughter is Sweet Pea and which one is Daisy Mae.

Sweet Pea is on the right.  Sweet Pea is the oldest and wears glasses.  She is uber responsible with them and puts Handsome Dude to shame.

Although I could venture to say that most peoples who wear glasses put Handsome Dude to shame.

Daisy Mae is on the left.  She has longer hair and often walks straight into walls and clear, glass doors.

***

Random-Topic-Quick-Change!

Turkeys can fly.

Now, some of you know-it-alls will laugh at my stupidity for not knowing this prior to moving out to middle-of-nowhere-ville.  But, rest assured, I am not the only person who was unaware of this.

Right?

I have seen them fly with my very own eyes.  And they flew to a great height.

Yet, when Lucy is chasing them they just look at the ground and quickly walk away.

Why?  Are they stupid?

***

Random-Topic-Quick-Change

I have seen 3 different ways to spell the word “Psych!” since posting it in my last post.

I went with the way my Psych class was spelled in college.

Yes!  I went to college!

Who knew?!

I also saw people write it like this: “Sike” and “Psyche.”

Which one is correct?

Please advise.

***

Random-Topic-Quick-Change

I got a text from my dearheart friend Bimlissa last night that read:

“Guess what!  I just fell asleep in the bathtub and woke up to my hair on fire!”

There are three lessons to be reaped from this text:

1)  Do not place lit candles near your head whilst taking a bath.

2)  Do not fall asleep while in the bath.

3)  Do not be so distraught about not seeing your dearheart friend Taylor and, as a result of your sorrow, act out in such reckless ways.

Don’t worry, Bimlissa.

I heard your cries for help.

I have booked a flight to mean old Tennessee and will be heading there in LESS THAN A MONTH!

Look at me with my big-girl-flying-all-by-myself-to-a-foreign-land pants on!

***

Random-Topic-Quick-Change!

I am all done with my Christmas shopping!

Holla, Taylor!

Holla!

***
Random-Topic-Quick-Change!

A few of you were concerned as to why I patched Handsome Dude’s eye.

Both Sweet Pea and Handsome Dude have poor eyesight in their right eye.  Because of this, when they are not wearing their glasses, the right eye wanders and they basically just use their left eye.

Handsome Dude’s eye is constantly wandering and worrying me.

When Sweet Pea was 2, the doctor had me patch her stronger eye for an hour a day for 6 months to force her to use and strengthen the weaker eye.  I have been noticing Handsome Dude’s eye wandering more often,  so I decided to patch it.

However.

This may surprise you, but keeping glasses on the lad is a bit of a struggle.  They are always:

A) Either lost

or

B) Severely damaged

So.  I usually patch for 2 days and then wait 1-2 weeks for glasses repair/recovery.

In all seriousness, I am truly concerned and worried about his eye.  I honestly try hard to keep those glasses on him and intact, but the Dude is stubborn and crazy and does reckless things like store his glasses on the floor while changing his clothes.

Then he steps on them.

Then he tries to sleep with them under his pillow.

Then he carefully stores them inside of his truck and forgets where he put his truck.

Then he asks “Cokey-da-bear” to hold them and Cokey (Little Dude . . .keep up, people!) snaps them in half.

And I give up.

But I can’t give up.  Because I can’t let him lose the use of his eye.

And so the vicious cycle continues.

Oh, and patching his eye is a definitely a treat.  Most of the time is spent with him wailing and weeping and writhing on the floor over all the agony and injustice and terror in the world.

Sometimes being a mom is fantastic.

***

Random-Topic-Quick-Change!

I have hit rock bottom.

Allow me to explain.

The other night, The Lumberjack went to use the bathroom.

I soon heard the shower going.

Then, he came out to get some cleaning supplies.

Me:  What’s going on?

LJ (short for Lumberjack. duh.):  I sat on the toilet and it was covered in Handsome Dude’s pee.

Me:  Oh.

LJ:  So I took a shower and now I am bleaching the toilet.

It’s true.

Handsome Dude feels no need to *ahem* hold anything while using the facilities.

He just let’s it all go and hopes for the best.

His accuracy rate is below par and pee can oft be found on the toilet seat.

Herein lies my worry:  Do you know how many times I have sat in my son’s pee?

I usually just sigh and hope for better days.

I have never thought to sanitize my body and the entire bathroom.

The thought is just preposterous.

I would be showering/sanitizing constantly.  And who has time for that?

I didn’t tell my husband my little secret.

The secret, of course, being that I am nasty.

But I do find it worrysome that my cleanliness standards have stooped lower than my husband who thinks nothing of sticking his arms up inside an elk carcass.

And on that note:  Happy Thursday!

 

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

33 Responses to Sigh and Hope for Better Days.

  1. michelle says:

    It shouldnt be hard to beautify the girls! They are adorable 🙂 Maybe an up-do for their hair with some flower barrettes all over. If they are like my girl, I curl her hair all cute and an hour later you cant even tell. That is frustrating. Hope its a fun trip, they will look gorgeous no matter what! Good luck with they eye.

  2. elizabeth says:

    You are correct in your usage of psych. Psyche is pronounced as sike-ee, and sike is “a small stream; especially : one that dries up in summer” (Merriam-Webster).

  3. Katie says:

    Your energy level astounds me! I’m tired and I was just reading the post!

  4. Holly says:

    1) Just do a simple braid in the girls hair and stick some random piece of baby’s breathe in it that you’ve stolen from the bridal bouquet.
    2) I remember seeing an episode of WKRP in Cincinnati where they dropped turkeys from a helicopter and then realized they couldn’t fly. I’m choosing to believe you. Or maybe Cincinnati turkeys are different than Ruralville turkeys. Gobble, gobble.
    3) Let’s go with Syke.
    4) Thank God burning hair stinks enough to wake us up.
    5) I don’t have my shopping done, gloater!
    6) Before you patch Handsome Dude’s eye, have him draw a picture of a really scary eye and then tape it over the patch. Then have him freak his sisters out for a while.
    7) What your husband doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Sit in the pee!! For crying out loud, the kid pee’d inside you for 9 months, what’s the diff?

    And now I have no time to write my own blog post.

  5. Becky Blackwell says:

    You’re going to Tennessee?! I’m jealous! I hope you guys have a fabulous time!

  6. MNStacey says:

    My son is 8, and when he was 4, his eye started wandering. The eye doc never even went the eye patch route, just straight to bottle lens glasses. Fortunately, my son took to wearing his glasses very well, in fact, feels a little lost without them (it helped that when he got them his teachers told him he looked very handsome – Maybe handsome dude needs a few chickies to tell him he’s lookin’ good 🙂 ). Ben’s eye is much stronger, the docs say that he most likely will have the glasses until he is about 12 or so. Don’t despair! Time will heal his eye muscle!

  7. Joyce says:

    Tennessee…I will also be there in less than a month. I heart East Tennessee, not sure if you will be east or west?

    If you look carefully you will notice a turkey’s head is pin sized compared to his body. I’m convinced that all birds made this way lack intelligence. Case in point, do you know how many pheasants I’ve struck with my car? It’s like they fly right into my windshield.

    I would not stress out about beautifying your already beautiful girls : )

  8. Marla says:

    Actually, I think this post was quite interesting and you always do so great with your titles.

    Your kids are cute… but the peeing thing disturbs me. Of course, I’m not a mother. I doubt I would go around taking twenty showers a day. I would, of course, look before I sit. Maybe that’s your solution?

    Happy Thursday, Taylor. 🙂

    Marla @ http://www.asthefarmturns.wordpress.com

  9. Lani says:

    Just tell David that urine is sterile. That’s what I tell my husband. And guess what? It’s true! So you’re not nasty! (Well, at least you’re no nastier than I. And probably every other mother in the world.)

  10. Jill says:

    I can’t help you with the hair thing. I have mostly boys. When their hair is long enough to comb, I know it’s time to cut it again. Clearly not advice you need for your girls.

    As to the pee thing, did I mention I have mostly boys? I don’t care how badly I have to go, I have not sat down without carefully inspecting the toilet seat in many years. Give LJ a container of Chlorox bathroom wipes for Christmas and tell him, “Welcome to my world.”

  11. Wendy says:

    I feel for you with the pee everywhere issue. I have a 4 year old son who doesn’t like to aim himself either! He also doesn’t like to lift the seat, or sit down. Arrgghhh… or even flush.. I’m almost resigned to all of my bathrooms smelling like outhouses these days. I do keep chlorox wipes in the bathrooms, but don’t like to sit down on a wet, bleached seat, so usually have to wipe, then wait with crossed legs for the toilet to dry!
    He’ s certainly teaching me to leave BOTH lid and seat up when I am finished with the toilet.
    My other 2 are girls, and I’m hoping potty training is less messy for girls. Please tell me it is so??

  12. Your girlies are SO pretty, they will be a piece of cake. At least you don’t have to sew two flower girl dresses!!! (not that I minded doing that for three weddings in the last couple years… Just in case one of my sisters reads my comment, ha!) I am a TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE hair do-er. Which is why my girls have shorter hair. I don’t like doing my own hair, much less two girls. I vote for pony tails, then use bobby pins and loop chunks of hair up and curl the ends to sort of tumble down. Then use a whole bottle of hairspray on them, and call it good.

    Yeah, I’m with you there on the pee. Who has time to do all that, all day long?! I am nasty right there with you, my friend.

    Will add your kiddo’s eyeballs to my prayer list. I also vote that you have lots of girls complement Handsome Dude on his glasses, and draw crazy eyes on the patch like others said, but I would say too that you ask him if he hates you (or doesn’t love you) every time he treats them disrespectfully. Ha!!! I’ve been known to do this when my girls repeatedly go against my wishes on something, and it’s proven effective for getting them to think about my feelings and the stress they induce through thoughtless disobedience.

    Have a wonderful day!!!!

  13. A story to top your pee story…and make you feel a lot less nasty.

    When Princess Hope was about 6 months old, she didn’t sleep…ever. When she pooped…it went EVERYWHERE! We lived in “almost Canada”, and it snowed a lot.
    One day, even though it was snowing, and she had decided that day was “poop everywhere day”, we HAD to go to the grocery store, for the only thing left in the pantry was a jar of salsa.

    So, of course, I bundle up a wiggly baby, bundle up a tired mommy, buckle said bundled wiggly baby into the car, buckle said mommy into the car, drive to the grocery store, unbuckle mommy, unbuckle baby, grab diaper bag, shuffle into store, find cart, put cart cover on cart, buckle baby, unbundle baby, unbundle mommy, proceed to shop….

    Then, I looked down. Right there, smack dab in the middle of the front of my shirt was…you guessed it…poo. Breast fed babies have very runny poo. It also is sticky. I paused for a few seconds, looked down, looked at my list, looked at the baby, looked around me…and kept on shopping. At that very moment in time, I knew I had entered into the sacred sisterhood of mommy-hood. The place where you just don’t care if baby poo is on your shirt and you are grocery shopping. A few swipes with a baby wipe, and I preteneded all was well. There was no way in heck I was going to back track all the way home, buckling and bundling, unbuckling and un bundling…just to change my shirt because of a little poo.

    there you go. NASTY! But, I am a mom, and nasty doesn’t seem to bother me anymore.

  14. Pee is 80% water and is actually pretty sterile. Those are the facts I comfort myself with each time I encounter the urine of my offspring.

    And your spelling of ‘”psych” is correct. “Sike” is just ridiculous and “phyche” requires saying a long “e” sound at the end of it.

    See how cool you are?

  15. diana at home says:

    http://miraflex.info/
    I don’t know what these glasses cost, I do know they are worth it. Unbreakable. AND there is a doctor near your Ruralville who carries them. Call today.

    See youtube tutorials for fixing beeyouuteeful fancy girly hairdos. Headband braid is an excellent choice and even trendy at the moment and not that hard ’cause I can do it.

    Clorox wipes for Chrismas – excellent idea!
    My 4 year old’s issue was solved by Grandma, who told him she would “rip his lips off” if he dared to piddle on her bathroom carpet. He loves his grandma. No more issues. Holla, Grandma. I could send her to see you. But she would also do your laundry without sorting it, put your dishes away where they don’t belong and notice if you had not dusted “in a while”. Love covers a multitude of irritations, does it not?

  16. Paula says:

    Clorox wipes are my friend. My very best friend. I have a 15 yr old boy and he pees everywhere. Help me. I kept going into his bathroom to “straighten” because I refuse to clean it, and I kept smelling something. Finally I got lower to the floor and realized it was the bath mat. Apparently, soaked in urine. I almost threw up. Don’t think I didn’t yell about that. Smelly boys. They just don’t out grow it for a VERY long time. ::sigh::

  17. Oh, poor Lumberjack. I’ve sat on a number of wet toilet seats and each time I do I think to myself, “Oh, I hope that was Jack,” because the thought of sitting on something left behind by his dad gives me the willies.
    Glamourous life, eh? 🙂
    Mindy
    http://www.thesuburbanlife.com

  18. Jean von B says:

    2 boys, 1 husband, all lazy….. been there, done that, should get a freakin’ medal!! 🙂

  19. JoAnn says:

    my son just barely started holding it himself after a year and a half of being potty trained. Guess who would hold it for him?
    Um, you could try that.
    because…my son would hit walls and ceilings. Have you checked your ceilings?

  20. Rachel Spin says:

    HOT TIPS

    This facebook site has a bunch of pictures of cute little girl hair with links to “How Tos” to do it yourself. I’m a visual person who likes to follow directions, so I liked this page.
    thhttp://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=18171&id=132926950063444
    I have 2 boys, and no little girls, so I am jealous.

  21. Allysa says:

    One of the teachers with whom I work has a husband and two grown sons. Since the beginning of their family, she has required all men in her family to sit down when going to the bathroom, even when it is just “#1.” Although she acknowledges that this was probably very emasculating, she has no regrets because she never had to sit in her husband’s or her sons’ pee.

    Food for thought…

  22. Rachel says:

    Somebody mentioned this already, but have the Dude personalize his eyepatch before attempting the attachment process. You could draw an eyeball, use stickers, or let him marker it up. Alternatively you could get an pirate eyepatch and use eye-strengthening time to play pirates.

  23. Everyone should sit down to use the bathroom–everyone! No exceptions!

    Random-Topic-Quick-Change! You’re coming to Tennessee!! If you happen to venture about 45 minutes northwest of Nashville, you’ll be in my neck of the woods! Come on over! BTW, the low tonight is about 18–bring warm clothes!

  24. Christina says:

    There is so much that I love about this post that I cannot begin to write of it here. Only because it is so late. I must go to bed. But know that looking at your blog and leaving this comment is the last thing I did before entering dreamland. I’m hoping that my dreams aren’t full of images of Lumberjacks covered in pee, wearing glasses, while feeling up inside a dead elk, as he waits at the altar while a turkey circles overhead, wearing an eyepatch (the turkey, not the lumberjack).

  25. Vicki B says:

    It’s amazing what mother’s of young children become oblivious/immune/couldn’t care less about. Not enough hours in the day.

    My daughter went here on the recommendation of my friend. They corrected her son’s vision after a botched “simple” surgery to correct wondering eye at another clinic. http://www.childrenseyefoundation.org/For-Parents.aspx

  26. Vicki B says:

    Oops, wrong link. This is the doctor my daughter and friend’s son saw. http://www.ski.org/AJampolsky_lab/

  27. Erin says:

    Taylor.
    We’ve been over this already.

    It doesn’t matter how you spell sike/psych/psyche.
    Because it is simply NOT USED anymore.

    Ever.

    (And sorry ’bout all the pee. I still help Derek at home, but I have no idea what happens when he’s at church or Awanas or the gym. I don’t want to know.)

  28. MindyLou says:

    I am already nauseaous(sp?) and this just made it really worse. Thought I’d share. Hilarious post nonetheless!! Really enjoyed it despite the need to yack. Over and out.

  29. Amber says:

    http://www.zennioptical.com is the best…the glasses start at $7/pair & I order at least 4 pairs at a time so my son is never w/o glasses. When they break, they send replacement frames for 1/2 price! We went through 19 pairs the first year (when he was 2)…but now he’s getting better & we’ve prob only been through 6-8 pairs this year.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *