Clay Stained Sweaters and Other Happenings

David and I were going to head out of town this weekend.  SANS CHILDREN.  We were trying to leave first thing Saturday morning, but life was happening.

1.  David wanted to put snow tires on Hadley’s new car.  Yes!  Hadley, the child who was formally known as Daisy Mae, needed snow tires for her car.  Because, remember?  SHE CANNOT DRIVE IN THE SNOW.

Hadley:  Mom.  Dad is SO RUDE to me.

Me:  Why?

Hadley:  He called me on Thursday AS I AM WALKING IN TO WORK and said he was about to buy me some snow tires and I needed to go with him.  I was like, “Dad, I cannot.” And he was like, “Hadley, it is time for you to be a responsible adult in life.” And I was like, “Dad, I am LITERALLY walking into work so I can be ON TIME for MY JOB.”

She had a point.

Anyways.  Before we left, David wanted to put on her snow tires.  But he bought the wrong size.  Oops.

2.  I looked out the window and noticed something looked funny with one of our cows.  I alerted David.  I am the “observerer” of cows and he is the one who actually has to do everything.  Next thing I know, he is removing a dead cow with his Bobcat.  And the cow was one of my favorites, but they are kind of all my favorites.

Rosie, Dutch Bro’s mom, died.

That is Rosie on the right.  We do not know how or why she died.

All the cows moo’d and stared at David has he removed her.  It was very sad.

It was a bummer deal.  And I shall have this day for mourning.

Anyways.  Those were the reasons that we left later than we had planned.

We get to the party and are enjoying our kid-free careless lives.  David even permitted a selfie.  But my Internet will not load it.  I will try later.

During the party, David was wreaking havoc, as per his usual custom.  There was a darling four year old boy with GLASSES on at our table.  And David kept sneaking him sugar packets.  I had to hide the sugar from him.  The gal next to me commented that it is like I have 5 children.  And, mmm-hmmm.

David won a TV!  Like a fancy one that has Netflix and such!

We are doubtful it will work for us with our terrible Internet situation.  But we are hopeful.

On our way home, we stopped and did some shopping.  I decided to try on a few things and noticed, sadly, that the darling sweater I was wearing had orange clay splotches in the back.

Apparently, it was in the first load of the washing machine after the water all turned to clay.  So, all day long, I was wearing a clay stained sweatshirt.  And it is my favorite sweater.  And I truly hope I can Oxi-clean it out.

Sometimes I dream about city living.

What would it be like to not be late to an event because your husband has to haul away your beloved dead cow?

How does it feel to know that if your water runs too long, it won’t turn to clay?

What would it be like to be able to upload photos with ease and speed when you needed them?

Will I ever be one of those people who saw a chicken feather on her carpet and found it odd?  Instead of normal?

Is it fun to watch things like Netflix and other sorts of streaming type shows?

I may never know.

***

Kate (Sweet Pea) and I have to share a vehicle right now because hers is broken down.  She was an utter delight and offered to help me in my classroom Friday.

And ten minutes before strategic reading groups, I found out my para could not come.  So I quickly trained Kate on how to lead a reading group and she totally saved the day!

Kate:  Mom.  Those kids do not listen.  I had to say the same thing like eight times.

Me:  Tell me about it.

Because of our vehicle woes, Kate had to take me to my oral surgeon appointment.  We confused the heck out of these people and everyone thought Taylor was the daughter and Kate was the mother because apparently, it is rare for a teen to bring her mom to the surgeon.

The surgeon informed me multiple times that if I was his wife, he would MAKE ME get these wisdom teeth out.  And how strange.  I am not his wife.  But whatever and I am getting them out on Friday.

I found one of my retired teacher friends to sub for me and she blessed me with the greatest gift one could ever gift a teacher.

Are you ready for it?

She said, and I quote: “You don’t need to worry about sub plans.  I will take care of it.”

I mean.

COME ON.

Does anyone here know the pain of sub plans?  Hello?

It takes hours upon hours.  And when I was a new teacher I took hours upon hours and typed many words to explicitly explain every detail in hopes that everything would go well and perfect.

Now I am a tired 6th year teacher and my sub plans have gotten far worse.  My new method is more like a “sink or swim” type approach.  Because ain’t nobody got time for that.

And people are feeling badly for me and saying, Oh such a shame that you must get your wisdom teeth out.  And I am like, oh yeah, too bad for me.  But I am secretly just fine because maybe I can lay in bed and have peace and quiet for a few days?  Yes?

Happy Sunday!