10 Cords of Tamarack

Well. 

 I was a bummer yesterday. 

Eeyore

 Sorry about that.

But thank you for all the encouragement.  It is nice to know that I am not the only mother with children who tend to be naughty.

Or.

Am.

I?

We went to town today and did many fun things.  I would not know if my children were not listening to me because I was having my fill of chatty-chatty-girl time with some friends.

Ignorance is bliss.

Some of you may recall that we got our family pictures taken this year. Don’t worry if you don’t recall.  It’s not important.

 The gal who took them, Monica, is a friend and does a great job! My in laws liked them and decided we should get our whole family done.  Yes.  That would be 16 people.  At the same time.  In one photo.

Dear Monica,

Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

Regards,

Taylor

Before we begin this intriguing journey, let us take a moment to look at the family picture from a year and a half ago.

Does anyone else see where the background ends in the photo?

Crazy.

And yes.  My son is trying to grab his crotch.

Alright.  Moving on.

Now, it is hard for anyone to get my husband to smile in a photograph.

This we know to be truth.

But guess what.

He has a brother.  And that brother is Alex.  And Alex is just as bad. 

Can you guess which one is Alex?

Hint:  He is wearing black.  ha.

Better Hint:  He is on the far right.

Oh, boys.

Here are some more group shots.

Things to notice:

1.  Alex looks cheerier.  Not.

2.  David looks cheerior.  Not.

3.  Handsome Dude is not trying to grab his crotch.  Not.

This was the silly shot.

This is what Alex smiles for. 

Points to notice:

1.  Where is Little Dude looking?

2.  My father in law is giving me bunny ears.  Odd.

3.  Great Grandma has looked at Handsome Dude.  This has caused him great fear and made him stop his crotch grabbing.

Thank you, Great Grandma.

Now this is a lovely shot of my husband with his family.

If you ignore the two Grumpy Grumpertons over there on the right.

Love it!

Let’s all covet Lisa’s gorgeous hair together now, shall we?

And what is with the smiles?

Fact:  I know what coerced the smiles.  Someone told the boys to think about 10 cords of Tamarack.

10 cords of Tamarack is every wood-cutter’s dream!  Keep up, people!

Are you confused?

Are you?

Are you?

My in laws with all their grandchildren.

*sigh*

Oh, Handsome Dude.

Well, people.  I tried.  I truly did.

I think they turned out splendidly.

100 (meaningless) points to anyone who knows what 10 Cords of Tamarack might mean.

Over and out!

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Prone to Wander

Well.  It finally happened.  My husband deemed last night to be the night that the two, yes, that’s right, two deer mounts should be hung on my pretty peach walls.

Lest any of you are confused, I dislike the peach.  Like a lot.

Now don’t get your panties all in a knot there, you silly readers, you.  He did not shoot two deer this season.  One of the mounts was from 2007. 

Exhibit A:

This classic buck is the fresh and hip 2010 model.  He is keeping a watchful eye o’er Sweet Pea as she does her studies.

See?

Deer heads in the house aren’t creepy at all.

Exhibit B:

He’s back.  Yes.  I named him Frank back in ’07 when he first hung in my house.

My husband finds the naming of his trophy bucks irksome.  But it helps me deal with the fact that the buck is now my decor.

Frank now hangs in the staircase of our new home.  The stairs lead up to the television.  I can be often found sneaking downstairs to pop me some corn and eat all sorts of glorious snacks at all hours of the night.  Perhaps Frank will creep me out, so much so that the snacks will lose their appeal.

One can only hope.

***

I am pretty sure I am the only person who struggles with this, but goodness, I am having a rough time with my kids over here.

I mean, seriously.

How many times must I repeat the same thing?

No.  You cannot take gum out of mommy’s purse.

Girls, get dressed.  It’s time for school.

Do not hit your brother with the truck.

Girls!  Time for school!  Get ready.

Where did you get that gum?

Do not play in my room.

Do not hit your brother with the train.

Girls!  School!

No Gum!  No!

Do not splash in the bath.

Where are the girls?

Lucy!  Do not eat my red sprinkles! 

LucyFur.

No splashing!

Do not hit your brother with your shoe.

Girls!  School!

Do not chase.

Do not hit.

Do not run.

Do not yell.

Do not splash.

Do not steal gum.

Do not be late for school.

*sigh*

Iamexhausted.

The last two days have been a constant struggle with these creatures.  And I must remind myself that they are a blessing.  And I do love them.  I really do.  And I am so thankful for them.

But, come on. 

Why can’t my day go the way that I hope?  Why can’t things run smoothly and the day go pleasantly and the chores get done cheerfully (ha!) and the lessons get done easily?

Days like today make me so sad.  I hate feeling this frustrated and I know I have shown my anger and crankiness at my kids today.  My attitude does not reflect how I truly feel about them.

I feel blessed to have each one of them.  I love their different personalities.  I am thankful that God has given them to me to take care of.  I love watching them grow and learn and change.

I love that they are mine.

I want to be a good mother.  I want to reflect God’s love to them.

But I am imperfect.

Does this surprise you?

This phrase from this song kept popping into my head today:

 O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let that grace now like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.

From “Come Thou Fount of Many Blessings” written by Robert Robinson.

Prone to wander.  That’s me.

God shows me grace daily-am I showing grace to my children?

I realized that in all my weariness today, I had forgotten to stop and pray.

This happens to me a lot. 

“Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders are in vain.
Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.
In vain you rise early and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat-for he grants sleep to those he loves.
Sons are a heritage from the Lord,
children a reward from him.
Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are sons born in one’s youth.
Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.”
Psalm 127: 1-5

God had to remind me again that when I am not putting him first, the rest is all in vain.

Turns out I don’t listen so well the first 1-492 times either.  My kids come by it honestly.

The End.

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Eating and visiting and eating and shopping and eating.

Does anyone else ever struggle with how to appropriately open a post?

Neither do I.

Good evening.  I am back from my trip to visit my dearheart friend Bimlissa   over in mean old Tennessee. 

Bimlissa=Melissa.  It’s a long story.

Interruption:  No need to check her blog for any posting about me.  She likes to pretend she doesn’t know me in real life, on account of how strangely I act whilst blogging.

I made it onto the plane.  I was offered no such choice about whether to receive the aforementioned naked body scan or to go with the heavy patting.  As luck would have it, I was able to get naked scanned in two separate states.  So that’s good to know. 

Fun Fact:  I was thinking that everyone in the vicinity of the security areas would be seeing my scan.  Kind of like how everyone can see the insides of my purse.  I was misinformed.  I am not sure where my scan went, but no one near me saw it.

I think.

The plane ride was long.

I had a fantastic time smiling and waving at all the small children and complimenting the exhausted parents.  And then I would keep smiling as I donned my headphones, listened to some tunes, sipped some coffee, and did my crossword puzzles.

Taylor without kids!  It was like I was just pretending to be me!

Once I arrived in the not-so-mean land of Tennessee, I was ushered to a Chick-fil-A post haste.  It was like Christmas for my taste buds.

The trip was splendid.  I had a lovely time catching up with my friend and her family.

Bimlissa has three children.  C is 9, J is 7 and G is 3 months old.  C and J were delightful for the entire trip and I thoroughly enjoyed visiting with them, which made it a little easier to be away from my hooligans for so long.

I played the card game “War” with J one night.  She was kicking my bum, so I congratulated her on her awesomeness.

“Yes,” J replied.  “The Royal Family has blessed me.”

Eh?!

Ah.  I love the things kids say.

Baby G tended to get a bit more particular than his siblings and would oft let us know when he found the conditions unsuitable.

But he was cute, so we permitted it.

On Friday we went shopping.  And eating.  It’s what we gal pals do best. 

It was C-O-L-D in Tennessee, much more so than I had anticipated.  For some reason, I had envisioned myself happily shopping the streets of Tennessee in January wearing flip-flops and capris.

Not so, dear readers.

Not so.

On Saturday, we beat feet to Nashville where we saw magnificent things like:

The Wildhorse Saloon

Some sort of silly stadium for “foosball.”

Ha!  Name that movie.

Look!  The Parthenon is in Nashville!

Who knew?!

The Opryland Hotel

On Sunday we went to church.

Then we ate and shopped and ate and shopped.

Then we grew tired of that nonsense.  So we took a break and went to get some frozen yogurt.

Bimlissa and I asked her dear children to take fabulous photos of us enjoying our time together.

And they did!

Kinda.

Sorta.

Everytime I called home my husband informed me that my children did not miss me. 

 But each time I talked to Handsome Dude he asked if I was on a truck or a plane and was the plane red or blue or or-nange and where was I and why can’t he see the plane and where did I park my truck and is the plane fast and he is not being naughty and where is Miss-a-liss-a and why am I there and where is the plane and can he have a cookie and when I was done with Miss-a-liss-a’s house, could I please come “bisit” his house?

So, I think that could be considered “missing me” . . . yes?  No?  Yes?

Alright.  That’s it. 

Does anyone else ever struggle with how to properly end a post?

Neither do I.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | 31 Comments

Oh Darn Oh Darn Oh Darn Oh Darn.

*ahem*

I am turning into a bit of a Nervous Nellie.

You see, dear readers, I don’t fly much. 

The thought of it all just makes me break out into a sweat.

Do you fly much?  I have several questions.

Please advise.

1.  Are belts still problematic?  Cause I wear one, but it is not a deal breaker.  It is merely a fashion accessory and most certainly not to hold my pants up.

Trust me.

My pants aren’t going anywhere.

2.  Do I have to take my shoes off?  Why?

3.  I know I can’t bring a water bottle.  Check.

4.  Can I play on my phone whilst soaring through the friendly skies?  I see it has an airplane mode?  Hmm?

5.  IPods?  Are IPods ok?

6.  I am going to get so bored.

7.  What if my suitcase is too heavy?

8.  What if I get lost?  What if I miss my connecting flight?

9.  What if I get Taylor-napped?

10.  This question is brought to you by my mean Facebookish friends.  I casually mentioned to them that I am leaving on a jet plane tomorrow and one friend, named Jodi, said, and I quote, “Have a fabulous time!! Naked scan or heavy patting at airport?”

Hold.

The.

Phone.

What is she talking about?

11.  Do I get a choice in the matter?  Cause if so, I am definitely going with the heavy patting. 

12.  Is that wrong?

13.  If they are only offering naked body scans, then I will have to lose at least 15 pounds before tomorrow morning.  I figure I have a fighting chance at this if I skip dinner.  Thoughts?

14.  Isn’t this an invasion of my privacy? 

15.  Can I bring food on the plane?

16.  Yes.  I understand that number 15 contradicts my whole plan to lose 15 pounds.  But I figure that once I am on the plane, I have already been scanned!  See?  No need to worry anymore!

17.  Seriously.  Can I bring snacks?  A banana?  Yogurt?  Brownies?

18.  I am nervous.

19.  It is snowing cats and dogs out here right now.  Will this affect my travel plans?

20.  Naked body scans?  Really.

Alright.  If you can help with any of the aforementioned quandaries, it would be most fantastic.

Also.  I do not know if I will be blogging from Tennessee.

Fun Fact:  I have no idea how to log into my blog from anywhere but my home computer.  Sad, I know. 

I have tried to before and cannot for the life of me figure it out.

Are we surprised that I am not yet a blogging tycoon?  No?  Yes?  No?

I shall be able to update on Facebook.  If you find Facebook annoying, then steer clear.  If that sort of thing rocks your world, you can like me on Facebook.

The choice is yours.

Goodbye for now!

Sincerly,

Soon-to-Scanned-and-Scared.

Posted in Uncategorized | 27 Comments

2010: The Final, Funtastic Chapter

I am sure that you have all been on the edge of your seats wondering what on earth happened in my life during the months of October, November, and December.

And I am sorry to have kept you in such suspense.  These recap posts take time, you know.

To catch up, click here.  Then here.  Then here.

October

1.  During the beginning of October, our world seemed to go all crazy like.  We had two vehicle breakdowns, an appliance that broke, we lost around $1000 worth of beef due to a child leaving the freezer open, and we were still sad about losing our Mabel dog.

Plus we had mice living in the trunk of our Honda.

Look at the cute nest they made!

2.  My sister swooned me and took me on a date to see the play Oklahoma!

My hair looks horrific in the above photo.  I don’t get out much.

Fun Fact:  Did you know that when you speak of the play, Oklahoma!, you must always use an exclamation point after writing it?  It’s true.  It really is.  Oklahoma!  See?  I did it again.

3.  I gave you all step by step instructions on how to be a superb hunting wife.  It was a wealth of information.

4.  Little Dude refused to wear pants for one whole day.

These are some exciting times out here in Ruralville.

5.  We brought Lucy into our lives.

Sure.  She looks cute.  But she is uber naughty.  Sandy gave me the greatest idea for a nickname for Lucy when she is being naughty:  LucyFur.

Holla, Sandy!

Holla.

Fun Fact:  Lucy peed on my carpet just this very evening.

LucyFur.

Although I must mention this:  The very week we brought Lucy home, I caught her chewing on a mouse body.

Disgusting, I know.

Nevertheless!  Since that darned dog has come into our lives, I have not seen one, nay, not one living mouse.

Holla, LucyFur!

Holla.

6.  I had a funtastic time making applesauce with my inlaws.

We made like 5,968 quarts.

We are spectacular.

And when I say we, I mean they. 

Fun Fact:  Did you know that in lieu of spending 8 hours making our own applesauce you could, in fact, purchase some at your local grocery store?  Who knew?!

7.  I shared this fun photo with you all.

Drool if you must, but I will not lend you my shiny, colorful shower curtain-like outfit.

8.  I had a minor panic attack when I realized that Halloween was mere days away and I had not costume for any of my children.

9.  I asked you to all pray for my unborn niece, Grace Elizabeth.  And I was overwhelmed by the response I got from you.  Thank you for all the prayers and kind words.  I know it meant a lot to my brother and sister-in-law, as well. 

Your continued prayers are still appreciated.   Grace is due around the first of March and has been diagnosed with Trisomy 13.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give away and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea . . .

Be still, and know that I am God.”

(Psalms 46:1, 2, and 10)

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. 

He determines the number of the stars and calls them by name.

Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit.”

Psalms 147: 3-5

November

1.  The beginning of November brought beautiful, gorgeous weather.

2.  I showed you all my lagoon.

Did you know that in Ruralville, “lagoon” is code for sewage/cess pool?

Don’t pretend you aren’t jealous.

3.  I shared with all-you-all’s how to properly take an epic picture of your husband with his trophy buck so he can preserve the glory for all eternity.

Take a picture that looks like this:

Not so much this:

4.  I told you the story of my husband and the pig.

That story was true.  And it was priceless.  And it captures the essence that is, my husband.

Unfortunately.

5.  The end-ish of November brought tons of snow.

I learned that our new driveway is about the length of a football field.

I learned how to use a snowblower.

I learned that I can, and do, make long underwear look good.

7.  Thanksgiving!

We were invited to the Clothed Open House hosted by the nearby Nudist Resort.

We declined, regrettfully.

8.  Engaged!

Jason and Amy got themselves engaged!

And thus endeth November.

Hang in there, peeps!  We are almost done!

December

1.  I spent days trying to figure out how to upload this darn video.

I am happy to report that it is still cute.

2.  We had our family pictures taken.

3.  We discovered that Lumberjacks can smile.

4.  We took a road trip to a wedding.

Whilst on the road trip, we stopped to see the ocean.

And my marmee asked me for help with the making of her Christmas card.

5.  My girls were flower girls.

6.  Our Christmas tree was dying a slow and messy death.

7.  Christmas!

8.  Sweet Pea turned 8!

And that concludes the year 2010.

Thank you to everyone who reads this silly rubbish of mine! 

It is appreciated!

Later, dudes!

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Monday Night List.

I do not have the necessary attention span required to finish my 4th installment of the year end recap at this time.

Therefore, I shall not.

But, don’t worry, you little readers, you!  I’m on it tomorrow like dots on dice. 

Yes.  That was dumb.

And now, a list.

1)  I, yes, I, Taylor Maliblahblah am flying to Tennessee on Thursday morning to visit my dearheart friend, Bimlissa.

2) I, yes, I, Taylor Maliblahblah am getting nervous.  What shall I do on the plane?  I am flying alone.  Poor me.

3)  I am sad to leave my kids.  There.  I said it.

4)  All day today, all I could think about was how I did not have one second of quiet time.  All day.  And yet I don’t want to leave them.  Clearly, I am a glutton for punishment.

5)  We started up school again today.  Again, why I am I sad to leave?

6)  The Lumberjack had the day off today.  This is rare.  So, he had the boys most of the morning and he even took over some of Daisy Mae’s lessons whilst I taught Sweet Pea.  And today still seemed overwhelming and I wish we could have done more. 

7)  Such is the plight of this homeschooling marmee.  Woe is me.

8)  I almost had a meltdown when I had to wash off raw pork chops.

9)  Sweet Pea turned 8 on Friday.  Woe is me.

10)  I saw Tangled for her birthday.  It was, in fact, fantastic and I cannot wait to see it again.

11)  As we were leaving Tangled, another gal hit my car.  It was not her fault.  She slid on the ice.  Once she made contact, Sweet Pea and company screamed and asked me if they were still alive.

12)  Turns out being 8 is drama filled.

13)  Is there humidity in Tennessee?  In January?  My hair no likey humidity.

14)  What if Bimlissa forgot how annoyingly lame I am in real life?  Perhaps she shall put me on the plane early, no?

15)  I heart SkipBo.

16)  Do you heart SkipBo?

17)  Do you know what SkipBo is?

18)  I ate a lot of peanut M and M’s today.

19)  Apparently I didn’t get the memo that I was starting Weight Watchers again today.  For reals.  Or realz.  Whichever you prefer.

20)  Little Dude tooted and noticed it for the first time today.  He laughed and laughed and yelled, “That’s funny!  My bum goes plbbbrrttt!”

Fun Fact:  I do not know how to type out a tooting sound.  I went with plbbrrttt.  You may improvise as you see fit.

21)  My husband just started a western.  Woe is me.

22)  I will bet you all one whole dollar he will fall asleep. 

23)  What did the girl volcano say to the boy volcano?  Do you lava me as much as I lava you?

24)  I am wasting your time tonight, aren’t I?

25)  I know!  You can vote for me!  I am in this contest, you see.  A contest that lasts until  NEXT OCTOBER.  So that’s fun.

Click on this link.

Find my blog.  It is called The Lumberjack’s Wife.

Do not be fooled.  I am not really married to a Lumberjack.  I just feign to be.

Click on the thumbs up sign by my name.  This is how you vote.

If you get distracted and vote for a better blog, I will understand.

Thank you and goodnight.

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Susie Fantastic.

Yes.  Hello.  How are you?

Welcome back to my thrilling year end recap.  Of which I did not get done in time for the year to end.

Such is life.

To catch up please click here and then here.  In that order.  Or else.

July

1.  Gladys was voted in by you, dear readers, to be the COW mascot.

You may ask, ‘Taylor!  What is the COW?”

The COW is short for Comment of the Week.  My dear pretend-friend, Mindee, coined the phrase.

You may also exclaim, “Taylor!  You are such a liar.  You don’t do the COW every week.”

I know, dear readers.

I know.

I am a very fickle girl and only announce a COW when I am feeling frisky.

Rest assured, being a COW is about as exciting as finding a wart.

2.  On July the 8th, The Lumberjack and I celebrated our factual 10 year wedding anniversary.

And I wrote a helpful, albeit pointless, post on How to Lose a Guy in Ten Years.

wedding

Ah.  The glory days.  The days when my husband would highlight his hair.

Young Lumberjack, young Lumberjack, wherefore art thou, O Young Lumberjack?

3.    This atrocity happened:

Oh. Be. Still. My. Heart.

4.  The Parachute Incident

It was a proud, wifely moment of mine.  A moment where I threw a fit and informed my husband, as well as everyone in a ten mile radius, that, and I quote,

“I NEVER WANTED THIS KIND OF LIFE.”

Good times.

5.  I spent lots of time with my dearheart friend Bimlissa, as she was soon departing for mean, old Tennessee.

I am on the left, Bimlissa is on the right.

This was the one season in our friendship where I *think* I weighed less than Bimlissa.

Attention Bimlissa:  Neener, neener.

Lest any of you are confused, her name is really Melissa.  Keep up!

6.  I posted the recipe for my favorite chocolate cake.  Yum!

7.  I discovered every single wall in my house is not, in fact, beige, like I had originally thought.

Nay.

The house is peach.

8.  And, of course, we went camping.  Here are some photos.

You know.  To rock your world.

here it is sorry it took so long. i did have any internet access

Tell me, dear readers.  Was your world rocked?

Was it?

For the love of Pete, July has gone on long enough.  Let’s move on.

August

1.  In August, I was starting to struggle with all the huge changes we had made in our lives and the general craziness that the year had brought.  I found this verse and clung to it:

“Yes this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:  Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.  I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him”

Lamentations 3:21-24

2.  More camping.  But now, we have introduced “The Search for The Holy Huckleberries” to our camping adventures.

You see, dear readers, my inlaws are all insane.  Oh, sure.  You might think your inlaws are insane.  But mine really are.  It’s true!  They actually like to camp and go without showers for days on end.  They get all tingly inside when they fall trees.  They bike.  They hike.  They climb.  They boat.  They fish. 

Ok.  Maybe they aren’t insane, per say.  Perhaps they are just exhausting.

I mean, come on!  Can’t we just sit and eat every now and then?  Why all the activities?

In my book, exercise=insanity.  Therefore, they are all insane. 

Bonus Joke:  My inlaws strip regularly on Thursdays.

hardy.  har.  har.

Simmer down, peeps.  They are professional furniture restorers.  Get your minds out of the gutter.

What was I talking about?

Huckleberries. 

They also really like huckleberries.  Yes.  Huckleberries are delicious.  But they are a pain in the hiney to pick.  I LOATHE it.

Hours upon countless hours of wretched picking.

And for what?

Like 10 berries.

For the love of everything, just buy them at the Farmer’s Market.

3.  More camping photos.  Again, to rock your world.

Yes.  We slid down rocks whilst wearing garbage bags.  Didn’t you?

4.  If you were reading my blog in August, or at least paying attention, you might remember Raul.

I heart Raul.

Here is the Raul segment:

When we go camping, we don’t always stay in a campground.  In fact, we would prefer not to.  But for this trip we did stay at one and the campground put on little events in the evenings that the kids enjoyed going to.  One such event was called “Birds at the Lake.”  The leader was from Portugal and had a slight language barrier, but he did a great job and it was very fun and entertaining.

I shall call him Raul.

Simply for the fact that Raul is a fantastic name.  Of which I am not certain I am spelling right. 

I think Raul may have transposed the letters in “Oh” . . .

thoughts?

He had about 3 or 4 songs with the word “ho” in it!  Too funny.  Or at least I thought it was funny.

He shared with us all sorts of fun bird facts, with a sprinkling here and there about bears.

And now, dear readers, I would like to present to you:

Raul’s Bear Story.

Raul:  I went to state park south of here.  I was walking and bird watching when I noticed movement in bush.  I was not scared.  I had my pepper spray.  You know, seasoning?  And that is my bear story.

Alrighty then.

5.  I switched my blog from thelumberjackswife.wordpress.com to www.thelumberjackswife.com

Why?

Who knows.

6.  My husband turned 30.

7.  He is old.

September

1.  In September, I took a much needed blogging break for a bit.

Does anyone else’s blog wear them out?  Does anyone else feel super paranoid?  Does anyone ever want to just delete their whole blog and pretend it never existed?

Is anyone else tired of getting asked any of the following questions:

“Why are you called The Lumberjack’s Wife?”

“I thought your husband was an electrician?  I am confused?”

“Why do you write in a blog?”

“What is a blog?”

“Do I have to be on Facebook to see it?  I hate Facebook.”

“What is a holla?”

“What is Ruralville?”

“Is that funny?”

“I used to read your blog, but I don’t have time.”

“Oh, do you still write in that silly blog?  I haven’t looked at it in months.  Have you read Susie Fantastic’s blog?  She’s so inspiring!  And she takes great pictures!”

“Do you make money?  No?  Why are you writing this?”

Oh, no.  I have never heard any of that stuff.  I was just curious if you ever had.

Can we all see why Taylor needed a blogging break?  No?  Yes?  No?

2.  We started homeschooling.

3.  We found baby mice in our utility trailer.

4.  Mabel, our smelly dog of 10 years started to get sick.

5.  Picture Day!

It did not go well.

7.  I was forced to dress up like a Pirate.

Then Kimberly called me Pirate Barbie.

So I showed her this picture to make her eat her words.

Take that, Kimberly!

8.  I spent the entire day chasing after a bunny.  And I threw a fit.

9.  My poor Mabel dog had to be put down.

10.  She and the bunny were both buried on the same day.  It was a bad day to be an animal in Ruralville.

And thus ended September.

Happy Late Sunday Night That I Am Up Blogging But Should Be Getting My Beauty Sleep!

 

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Short and Succinct

Here is the second installment of my fantastic recap of the year 2010.

I hope you have your party pants on.

April

1.  I made fun of people who wear socks with sandals.

It is against everything I believe in.

But then . . . then I remembered this photo:

and I had to eat humble pie.

2.  Also in April, I lived through two horrifying experiences:

A)  I had to take my boys with me to the doctor’s office and they watched me pee in a cup.  It was magical.

B)  We made the most disgusting, epic entrance to a birthday party.  Ever. 

3.  Handsome Dude peed on my dryer.

4.  We started to get busy with our last home remodeling projects in hopes of moving out.

And when I say “we,” I, of course, mean The Lumberjack.

“We” worked on the kitchen.

“We” worked on the yard.

And “we” worked on the laundry room:

I focused in on the wrong stud.

5.  Handsome Dude began insisting on dressing himself daily.

To this day, he still forgets to put on socks and puts his shoes on the wrong feet.

And I am too tired to care.

6.  Are you thinking that the “April” section is getting too long?

You are not alone.

7.  After two months of waiting and wondering, we discovered that the bank would accept our offer on the Ruralville house.

And thus began the longest, most worrisome, closing period known to man.

8.  I started a Facebook page for this blog. 

9.  The Lumberjack brought home some deer antlers and Handsome Dude tried desperately to find someone to help him, “Bix da Elk.”

May

1.  I had my one year blogging anniversary.

2.  Handsome Dude got, yet another, new pair of glasses.

Of which he has taken superb care of.

Not.

3.  I took my boys on a walk.

We saw many feathered friends, all of which my boys called, “Ducks! Quack!”

Fact Check:  This was from when we lived at our old house.  This is not, I repeat, not Ruralville.  Ruralville does not have sidewalks.

4.  I took Daisy Mae shopping with me and made the mistake of allowing her into the fitting room with me.

Oh, for the poking!

Oh, for the questions!

Oh, for the chubs!

5.  Sister Meagan graduated from college.

And Daisy Mae was taken to the ER.  So, that was a dull trip.

6.  Little Dude learned the parts of the body.

7.  We took our first camping trip.

8.  “We” were still working on our house.

June

1.  “We” finished “our” projects.

Actually, the Lumberjack finished his projects.

I was just there to be his eye candy.

Or something like that.

2.  Handsome Dude put the hangers away for me.

He is uber helpful.

3.  We officially closed on the Ruralville house.

4.  Daisy Mae graduated from Kindergarten.

5.  My grammy died.

6.  Little Dude turned 2.

7.  Between the move to Ruralville and getting our other house ready for vacation rentals, The Lumberjack and I experienced a bit of stress.

Serenity Now.

8.  I turned 29.  For the first time.

***

Wow.  That post was short and succinct.

Tell me, dear reader . . . what was something memorable you did in the year 2010?

Happy Thursday!

 

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