The Lumberjack's Wife

The dogs dropped this partial skull off in a bush-

-so that’s fun.

Do not ask me to identify who/what the skull belonged to or tell you from whence it came.

I know not.

Handsome Dude got his driver’s license and allowed me to snap this photo provided I permit his dog pal, Norman, to be in the picture.

He is proving to be an excellent and most responsible driver and has so far aired up the tires of my car before leaving more than I ever have.

Basketball is on like Donkey Kong over here. The boys have a major fan club full of relatives and loved ones who come to each game and cheer them on.

Mother and I were noticing how shabby the Varsity boys basketball uniforms were getting, so I mentioned this to HD and he said, and I quote,

“Tell me about it. I hate them. And they make me look fat.”

So, in order for you to visualize this weight problem of HD’s, I would like to present to you this photo:

Here he is making a fancy reverse layup sort of move, and he sure looks like he could lose a few pounds, you know?

Every night at dinner before he dishes his plate, he has the audacity to start making himself a huckleberry milkshake for his dinner time beverage.

Me: Dude. What are you doing?

HD: GOSH. I am making a milkshake.

Me: It is dinner. You can have a milkshake after dinner.

HD: MOM. You can see all of my bones.

Me: Fair enough.

Speaking of the boys’ fan club, David’s parents have recently purchased stadium seats to add to their personal comfort while they watch the game.

When Grandpa got to the game last night, he loudly announced to the dad of another player, and I quote:

“THESE STADIUM SEATS ARE GREAT FOR HEMORRHOIDS.”

And THAT, Reader, is definitely a fun and useful fact.

Anyways. We are having a swell time with basketball. HD makes the paper often for his stats, but he recently had a photo in the paper-

So, let us all be impressed with him and my ability to make secret secrets blurry.

Here is LD being all super fantastic.

Have I told you that LD is growing a mullet?

LD is growing a mullet.

Both boys started in a recent Varsity game and I got this fun bro/bro photo of them.

Can you tell I am enjoying the high school basketball years?

Let’s move on.

Kate is home from Kansas and also had the audacity to turn TWENTY years old.

Reader.

My child is 20.

How am I this old? I should probably get a stadium seat. Hemorrhoids are probably just around the corner.

Hadley is missing Kason again. He is being most important and is aboard an ice cutter ship headed for Antarctica.

And look at this picture he sent me:

One evening, Hadley was being a trifle moody, which is so ODD for daughters, you know? Anyways, Kate made some sort of complaint and Hadley made this statement:

“At least YOUR boyfriend is on US soil!”

And if that isn’t just the best quote to end all quotes. I need a shirt made with that one. Imma gonna wear it as I carry my stadium seat into the gym to prevent hemorrhoids and cheer for my overweight son and my other mullet-sporting son. Getting old sure is something.

Calves.

Let’s discuss them.

One handsome boy was born bright and early on New Years Day. I went out to check on him before dark and this is what I saw.

Now, I am no cow rancher, but this certainly did not look good.

Somehow the cows had pushed this feeder all around and I couldn’t get inside to help him and mama couldn’t get him, and if you take a good look at him, he sure doesn’t look capable of helping himself.

In fairness to him, he was probably 12 hours old at the time. So, we will grant him grace.

I texted for David to come help me, because he is the one pretending we are ranchers, and I waited with the little guy and snuck in tons of pets while the mama yell-mood at me. I even turned him right side up.

So, I am basically a hero. Then David came and we got him out and he and his mother made lots of concerned moos at each other and walked off into the dusk for a nursing sesh.

Anyways we have had four calves born this season, but one has died. And here are your obligatory cow pictures, for your viewing pleasure.

Bunch of good looking gals, I tell ya.

Awhile back, I mentioned we took back one of Mama’s kittens, Bear, and he ran away, but then was found in the hay barn.

We do see him from time to time, but it has been awhile since I have had a Bear sighting. We had quite the cold snap recently, and I was worried he might not have survived.

Today I went out to the hay barn with fresh food and he came right to me.

I grabbed him and brought him to the house, but he has mistaken us all for serial killers and finds us to be loathesome.

I opened the door and he bolted right back to the hay barn.

So. We have a legit barn cat now. Named Bear.

Alright.

Have a good day.

This is how Rio chooses to get my attention while I am preparing my Christmas cards.

Because we have literally NO control over our bull, our cows have started calving. And, Reader. It is frigid out there.

Here is calf number one. She is called Poppie, short for Popsicle.

She has a good mama who bundles her up in the hay.

Calf Number 2 did not fare well. He was brought into the house by the fire. David and I gave him an antibiotic and tube fed him, and hoped for the best.

But he died in the night.

Right on the floor of my very own home.

David and I went out of town for one night, and of course, while we were away, another calf was born in the frigid temps. The kids were certain the calf was doomed and also brought him into the house by the fire.

I pleaded with them over the text messaging. I asked them to please put a few blankets under the calf.

Yes. This is the picture I received from my kids when I was miles upon miles away. And every text I sent them requesting a picture of the calf on TOP of SOMETHING, went unanswered.

It was radio silence, my friends.

Bad News: The kids did not protect the carpet.

Good News: The calf survived.

News of Hope for a Future: HD carpet cleaned the carpet area where the calf resided so it would be all clean when we got home.

David and I went to check on the little guy when we arrived home.

All is well. His name is G.W. Just because it is.

Basketball is in full swing and my boys are basically super stars. But this we knew.

They had a game a bit ago and it was NOT going well. They were down by about 14-20 points the entire game, but in the fourth quarter, they started to come back. They were down by two points with 2.3 seconds left in the game and HD was fouled on the shot.

Reader. He had to take his two shots in front of everyone in the world, plus their mothers, and he took them AND HE MADE THEM. He tied the game, they went into overtime, they won by 9. He had 19 points. *My Hero*

Today is Friday. I had ear surgery on Wednesday.

I have had hearing loss since childhood. I had surgery when I was 12 and had a prosthetic put into place at that time, but my hearing has gotten worse. On Wednesday, they removed the old prosthetic, which was detatched and “flapping around” and put in a new one. My ear is not feeling top notch and I have cotton stuffed inside of it, but I think I can already hear better.

When I came out of surgery, I asked David,

“How do I look?”

And he said,

“Well. You have looked worse.”

And so, now, I would like to announce my new life verse for the week.

It can be found in the third chapter of Lamentations.

“So I say, ‘My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped for from the Lord.”

Happy Friday.

We had a surprise snow day this week, and, Reader, may I take this moment to tell you that the surprise snow day is one of THE best perks to being a teacher.

The boys and I spent the entire day at home, driving absolutely nowhere, and hanging with the poochies. The dogs act like they have never seen the world before when there is snow, and all was just happy in our little home.

And then. Then HD decided to plow snow. And as he was on a gigantic machine, he called me, and this was the conversation.

HD: Mom. I am trying to plow and I need to LD to get this dead chicken from the driveway. I asked him and he said I needed to “be a man” and get the chicken myself.

Me: How did the chicken die?

HD: I don’t know! Dogs? Snow? Can you get him out here!?

Me: Ok.

Me to LD: Dude. Go outside and pick up the dead chicken.

LD: HD can do it.

Me: No. You need to do it. Now.

LD: Fineeeeeeeeeeeeee.

LD goes outside in shorts, a t shirt, and sandals to address the dead chicken issue.

He comes back.

LD: Mom! What do you want me to do with the dead chicken!?

Me: I don’t know! Something!

LD: Mom!

Me: Get a paper Winco bag. Stick the dead chicken in the Winco bag and set it on the porch for someone to take the dump.

LD: Fineeeeeeeeeeeeee.

HD comes in later from plowing.

HD: Mom! Why is there a dead chicken in a Winco bag on the front porch?!

Me: For someone to take the dump!

HD: Why would you do that? Why wouldn’t you throw it into the woods?

Me: Feel free to throw it into the woods.

No one threw it into the woods. And the dead chicken was forgotten about for a few days and sat on the porch in the brown Winco bag.

Because that is how normal we are.

We had company for Thanksgiving. Getting ready for company at my house is always a treat. Because I tend to look at things like baseboards and windows and panic and try to clean them, and then when the house is almost clean, I notice that David put these in the woodbox:

I mean. How can I even prepare my house for guests when my own kin are working against me.

Me: David!? Why are there cow legs in the woodbox?

David: They aren’t cow legs. They are ELK legs.

Me: Why are they in the wood box?

David: So they can thaw out. I am going to make a gun rack with them.

???

Me: No.

David: Yes.

Me:

He finally agreed to remove them, however, I neglected to make it abundantly clear that I needed them NOT in the home, and he just stuffed them in another room and Norman the dog found them and there were elk legs all about the house.

Let’s talk about having company at my house.

It is a hot mess.

As soon as company arrived, the dogs unearthed a gut pile and had a joyous holiday week bringing us bits and pieces of discarded carcasses.

So. I would be making sure the living room was dusted and vacummed without realizing that before guests would enter my clean home, they had to step over this:

I surely hope my guests admired my dustless windowsills.

I mean, these dogs were relentless. They would not stop bringing in body parts.

Me: Ugh! The dang dogs brought in another cow foot! Someone please pick it up.

Family: What should we do with it?

Me: Put it in a Winco bag! We’ll take it to the dump.

Yes. This is my life.

And maybe I should do a commercial for Winco.

Winco. Not only do I find affordable prices on groceries the whole family enjoys, I get to choose brown paper bags to take home for all my carcass disposal needs!

***

A new student joined my fabulous first grade. This little guy is very, very low academically. Sad news is, he is already leaving again. Moving to a new school. Had him for about two weeks.

But anyways. He needs some extra support. On his “Thankful” piece, I had an aide use a highlighter to write what he wanted to say so he could trace it.

After he was done, he took a black marker and wrote an “M” on it and came up to me.

He said, “I am thankful for Mrs. M.”

So. That’s why I have the best job in the world.

***

My friend asked me to take in her cat. This cat originally came from my home during the Covid quarantine of 2020 when 16 kittens were born in my own, obviously clean and sanitary, house. This cat is now 2 years old and his name is Bear. He is the son of Mama Kitty.

Mama Kitty. Best Mama Cat ever.

Yes. There is a giant skull on my wall. Is there one on yours?

Anyways.

Bear lasted about 12 hours in our house and decided he had had quite enough of my 3 dogs and 3 cats and he ran away. We looked for quite a few days, but he was gone.

About 2-3 weeks later, I spotted him living his best life in our hay barn! Glory! He was alive. And then we thought about it and talked about how we had noticed Mama Kitty going out to the hay barn a lot lately, so we are all agog with her and sure that she has remember he is her son and she went out there to teach him how to slay mice and survive in the wild.

Such a good Mama.

***

All four kids were home for Thanksgiving.

Twas lovely.

***

Something might be wrong with my email subscription feature.

But I don’t know what, nor do I understand how to fix it.

Ok.

Happy Friday!

We decided we needed to try and build up the bank of our river property to help with spring flooding.  We hired a guy and he did the building up part, and then we went to smooth it out and plant grass seed.

Side note.  This is the second tree we have lost to a beaver.

Anyways we raked smooth all these track mark things from the machines-

And got it all smooth and ready for grass.

We then spread the grass seed and walked over it to “plant” it.

Here are the boys with their cousins doing just that.

Basketball season is starting up for the boys.  HD found out he made Varsity, and LD is a swing player, meaning he will be on JV, but also join Varsity.  HD is working on getting his driver’s license, Kate is far away doing college like things, and Hadley is home/working/going to college.  Things are just trucking along with our family.

Meanwhile, in fabulous first grade . . .

We finished all six books of Mercy Watson and had our toast party.

Let us discuss life in the fabulous first grade.  For it brings me joy.

Buddy.  Remember Buddy?  Buddy is a goose.  He is just a silly goose.  He is not on planet Earth, so sometimes it is hard to teach him.  I was lucky enough to have an aide able to help out for a bit in my classroom the other day, so I asked her to sit by Buddy during his monthly computer reading test.

Did you know that THE BEST way to determing whether six year olds can read is by putting them on a computer with headphones and having them take a test all by themselves and assume they won’t get distracted and will for surely be trying their best at all times and not get bored and definitely show their best?

Well.  That’s how we do.

So.  I knew Buddy would have a hard time putting forth his best effort, so I asked the aide, Mrs. H., to sit by him.  This test has several subtests, and at the end of each subtest, the test will show a graph and the kids can see if their score went up from the last time they took the test.

So, Mrs. H. is by him, giving him back pats and gently redirecting his head back to the area of where the computer is and Buddy finishes a subtest.  I can see from where I am standing that his graph has gone up-significantly.  Meaning, he did well and did much better than last month.

Buddy’s mouth drops and he whisper shouts to Mrs. H:

I AM SO SHOCKED!

And Mrs. H smiles at him and says, “I wasn’t shocked!”

And his smile was gold.  At the end of the test, he was putting away his computer.

Me:  You did a good job on your test, Buddy!

Buddy:  I KNOW!  I only got distracted like 3 or 4 times today!

Bless his little heart.

And bless Mrs. H.

***

Awhile back, I was teaching verbs.  I start with just action verbs and I teach them something I learned during my homeschool years called “The Verb Finder.”

The verb finder tells the kids to ask, “Can I _____?” And if the answer is yes, it is a verb.

Can I walk?  Yes!  Can I smile?  Yes!  Can I cat?  No (giggle, giggle).

Me:  Let’s try run.  Can I run?

Student loudly shouting:  NO!  WE NEVER RUN IN THE CLASSROOM!

***

A student who is now in 4th grade came into my classroom yesterday morning.  He usually stops in every morning to say hello.  He was with me during the 2019-2020 school year when we had to shut down in March.

4th grader:  You know what’s not fair?

Me:  What?

4th grader:  We didn’t get to finish 1st grade.

Me:  Oh, that’s right.  That was the year we shut down early.  Yes, that was a bummer.

4th grader:  I really liked first grade.  I don’t think that is fair.

Me (teasing):  Well, you can come back now!  Just think of how advanced you will be!

4th grader:  Ha.  Well I want to.

Me:  You cannot!  You know it all.  What does the letter “e” say?

4th grader:

Me:

4th grader:

Me:  Well, have a good day in 4th grade!

***

One of my boys is a farter.  And, yes, that sounds rude, but there isn’t a polite way to put it.  It’s like it is his joy in life to do this.  And he does it.  Often.

Sure, at first it would get some giggles from his peers, but frankly, we are all just over it.

We were lining up to leave PE the other day, and I saw him get out of line and walk to the back.

Me:  Dude?  What are you doing?

Boy:  Polly told me I had to go to the back of the line.

I look at Polly, another student, trying to convey disappointment in her bossiness.

Me:  Why are you telling him to go to the end of the line, Polly?

Polly:  Because he WON’T.  STOP.  FARTING.

Me:  Oh, ok.  I understand.

***

One of my boys talks in a very deep voice.  It is a total man voice.  We went on a walking field trip the other day, and I happened to be walking right near him.

I hear a man voice loudly proclaim:  “I am taking a walk with Taylor Maliblahblah.”

Except he said my real last name.

Me:  How do you know my first name?

Boy:  Oh, I know it.

Boy had to leave early for throwing up in the classroom all over the floor.  He came back after staying home for a bit to make sure he was back to good health.

Boy (in man voice):  I sure hated being home sick.  I had to miss out on all that learning!

***

My little Ukranian girl makes my world go round.  She is the cutest thing and whenever she doesn’t know what someone is saying to her, she breaks out ALL of her dimples and does this cute little “I don’t know” shrug.  She is a hard worker and is catching on very quickly.

In all honestly, folks, I think she is a child genius.

She is one of my top math students, which make sense, because numbers are the same.  She came in not knowing any letters, and now she has all their sounds.  So, we are working on blending, and that is seriously the most precious thing you could ever see in your entire life.

Girl:  C . . . . a . . . . .t

Me:  Ok, blend.

Girl, with very exaggerated head motions, tries to sound out the word and it sounds something more like if you said “Caught” and drug out the vowel sound for an extra long time.

I do not think they have the digraph “th” in the Ukraine, and that is a delight to teach her.  Precious pumpkin does NOT know what to do with her tongue.

Spit goes everywhere, but that girl is working hard!  I suspect she might take over the world.

***

We divide our entire first grade into tiers for strategic reading instruction.  I have the lowest tier, and within that tier, I have them grouped low to high to target their specific needs.

Let’s talk about my Tier 3 Group A .  There are only a handful of them, but they need a lot of targeted practice.

This is what I sound like.

Open the book.  Point to the first word.  No, open the book.  Your book is upside down.  Point to the word.  What is this word?

Student:  t . . . . . h . . . . . e

Oh!  This is a red word!  We cannot sound it out!  Who knows what this word is?  Yes!  You try!

Student: t . . . . h . . . . . e

Remember our song?  “You can say the and you can say the (thee) but you always spell it . . . ”
Kids:  T-H-E!

Right!  T-H-E spells the!  So let’s try this word again!

Student:  t . . . h . . . . e

The word is “the!”  Let’s move on!  Point to the next word.  Everybody!  Get your fingers ready!  Let’s say the sounds!  Oh!  You need to point to the word, please!  Hands out of pants!  Ok!

Student:  b . . . . i . . . . t

Yes!  Now blend it into a word!

Student: top?

So.  That’s what happens in case anyone was wondering why I fall asleep most nights before 8pm.

And . . . I love them.  And its still early in the year, so I am all full of hope and promise and sure I will get them reading.

And they WILL READ THE WORD “the.”

Wish me luck!

Happy Weekend!

 

Every morning, one of my students walks in, pink lipstick smeared ALL over her face, and says:

“Hi-Ya, Teach!”

And that is just fantastic.

Life is tricky hard right now.  I am powering through.  I also have a “spirited”class and I am not as full of joy as I had anticipated I would be.  I would almost say I am bereft of joy.  And, yet.  I press on.

I took Hadley to see Kason graduate.

The trip was fast and fun!  We even squeezed in a Phillies’ game.

Hadley and Kason tried a cheesesteak.  As people do in Philly.

Other than that, life has been plugging along.  My class is TRICKY.  I have a lot of behavior needs, as well as academic needs.  This group will keep me on my toes.

One of my boys is literally EXHAUSTING and I have to be on him all the time.  Bless his heart.

The other day, he was leaving for the bus.  He started for the door, then quickly turned around and dropped something on my desk.

“Mrs. M!  Don’t read that until I am gone!”

And off he went.

The note?

I am not exactly sure as to what is says, but I am chosing to believe it was a nice note.

David stopped by my classroom for a minute the other day, and one of my kids, who is A LOT behavior wise, and also quite low, motioned for David to come close to him.

Kid, whispering:  Hey!  Hey, you!

David:  What?

Kid:  Can you come back every day and help me?  For like ten days?  I have no idea what’s going on.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Poor guy.

And . . . I love them.

We had our first apple harvest.

Plus one pear.

This was the only apple tree to bear apples this year.  And this apple tree was run over by Kate and a four wheeler a couple of years ago.  David was all grumpy like and said the tree was, and I quote, “a gone-er.”

I was trying to keep spirits up, so I was like, “Nonsense!” and duck-taped the trunk.

The duck tape is still there.  And we have apples.

So we made a crisp.

Our friend gave us fresh peaches, so we canned them.

We still have cows.

Matilda is still the most beautiful.

The puppy brothers turned two years old day.

Niko

Norman.

They have my heart.

Happy Sunday!

This year at school, when I take my first graders to lunch, my “old” first graders are already eating in the cafeteria.  So, I often stop and check in with them.

We as a class had nicknamed one girl, “The Chicken Lady.”  Chicken Lady Girl was an expert on chickens and hatching chicks because her family is into it all.  At the end of last year, her mother sent me some fertilized eggs so I could try and hatch some new chicks for my farm.

Chicken Lady Girl:  Mrs. M.  My mom wanted me to ask you how the eggs turned out?  Did any hatch?

Me:  Oh, yes!  I have so many chickens now!

Chicken Lady Girl is all proud and happy and takes a bite out of her sandwich.

Me:  Yesterday, I was looking in the pig pen and I even saw one of the hens that I hatched hanging out with the pigs!  She was walking on the pigs backs and eating all the food around them!  I wonder if she will stay with the pigs or go back and live with the chickens?

Chicken Lady Girl and kids near her are all amazed and interested and would like a picture of this hen, and I tell them I will try.

When I got home, the white hen was no longer with the pigs, so that was a bummer.  I really wanted to show them a picture!  A bit later I saw the same hen, but now she was with the cows.  I snapped a picture and wrote a little story about this white hen in an email to my old class and attached the picture.  Their new teacher read it to them and showed them the picture.

A day or so later, Mac popped into my room.  Do you remember Mac from last year?  Do you?  Do you?

He has grown up!  He does not twirl and walk into walls!  He is still precious to my heart!

I had given Mac a bag of books to read at home, and he had forgotten to return them.

Mac:  Mrs. M?  My mom wanted me to bring you back these books.

Me:  Oh, thank you!  How are you?  You look like a big second grader now!

Mac beams with pride.  Because he is a big second grader now.

Mac:  Mrs. M?  Can you send more pictures and stories about that white hen?  The one that lived with the pigs and now lives with the cows?

Me:  I will!

And then he looked around my classroom and told me it looked like our old first grade classroom and he calmly walked back to class.

And I love him.  And I will now be stalking the white hen for content.

***

I am way into showtunes right now.  I like them for two reasons.

1.  They are just simply fun to sing along with!
2. They absolutely annoy my teen children!

Currently, I am enjoying all things Hello, Dolly! and Les Miserables.   And it is playing around the clock.

LD:  Mom.  Sometimes I question your taste in music.

I greatly annoyed Hadley the other day.  It was fun!  She was miffed because I asked her to do something.  You know how I be.  Naggy and such.  Asking kids to pick up after themselves.  The nerve.

Anyways.  I had my ear pod things in and was belting out Hello, Dolly! at the time and Reader, you would not believe the look of complete annoyance on that child’s face.  It was priceless.  And I did not stop.

Speaking of Hadley, exciting things are coming to be.

Kason, her boyfriend, is finally finished with basic training for the Coast Guard and she will get to see him soon.  Before he left, they had talked about her going to Cape May to see him graduate, and decided she wouldn’t because he would be home soon after and it might be expensive.  But his kind parents invited her along anyways, yet, she declined.

Well.  Time passed and Hadley was very Sadley and she asked me if we could look into going.  So.  Long story short-Hadley and I are taking off soon to *surprise* Kason and see him graduate.  We will be with him and his family for the rest of the trip and get to see a baseball game and all sorts of fun things.

He finally got to call her and he was asking her to please try and come.  She told him she couldn’t-so he isn’t expecting her and it is all very exciting.

Do I feel like a third wheel?

Yes.  Yes, I do.

 

We ended summer with our big camping trip.  We had a huge group spend anywhere from 3-4 nights at our river property.

And here is something I learned.

Our outhouse was NOT meant to handle that many people.

HD:  Mom.  Something is wrong with someone.  I think someone is having digestive issues.

*Delightful*

Let us keep whomever had to come clean our outhouse out in our thoughts and prayers.

My mother has fallen in love with my dogs.  And this is something we cannot blame her for.  They are all that is precious in this world.

“Taylor.  I have bones for the dogs.  Now take their pictures with them.”

“Taylor.  I bought special balls for the dogs to play with at the river.  They can be from Grams.”

“Taylor.  When can the dogs come out of their kennels?”

Our dogs have a happy existence when they come to the river.  Here is a little video of them enjoying some summer sun.

I would like to title this video:
THE SAME THINGS HAPPENS EVERYTIME.

We have three dogs, but Alex’s dog, Oakley is also in this video.

Norman always waits in the water.  He feels this is the best strategy to fetch the floaty toy.

Niko always waits at the bank.  At the very last moment, he does a little leaping move and it puts him at an advantage.

Charlie is too slow and will just bark from the beach.

Niko gets the floaty toy 90% of the time.

Let’s move on.

School has started.  I came in on cloud nine and with high hopes and I feel a bit disappointed.  I was not as full of joy as I thought I would be.

Mostly I am tired and hot.  And it is hard to be patient when one is so dang hot.

There are just so many of them!  And they are as a collective whole, a more trying group than last year.  I had to break out the extra firm teaching voice on day one, and that usually doesn’t happen.  Usually we get a bit of a honeymoon with these little folks.

 

This is what I sound like all day:

Who is beeping?

Turn around and look at me.

Why are you facing that way?  I am right here.  Look at me.

Do not talk while I am talking.

Stop beeping.

Sit up.  We are not laying down.

Look at me.

Where are your eyes?

Keep your hands to yourself.

Stop beeping.

Eyes on me!

Look at me now, young man.  This isn’t KINDERGARTEN.  If I tell you to stop beeping you need to stop beeping.

Anyways.  No joy for me.  Yet.  Although I strongly suspect Beeping Boy is having a lot of fun.

Let’s talk about Buddy.

I sort of had Buddy pegged wrong for the first day.  I thought he was just kind of all over the place, but he seemed like he knew the lay of the land and could get around the building.

I was grossly mistaken, Reader.

Buddy rides the bus.  Two other girls who are new to us also ride his bus.

Me:  Buddy.  You remember how to get on the bus from last year, right?

Buddy:  Yup!

Me:  Great.  Take these two with you and get on your bus and I will see you tomorrow.

Buddy:  Ok!

And off they went.  And where they went, I am not sure, but they certainly didn’t get on a bus.  They ended up somewhere in the building and all three of them missed the bus.

Now that I know Buddy a bit more, I have decided that he is not on planet Earth.  Which is a bummer, because that is where the rest of us are.

Every day with the lunch ordering!  Oh my goodness, Lord grant me patience.

Me:  Buddy.  Do you need to order lunch?

Buddy:  Yup! I will have chicken nuggets.

Me:  Ok.

*1 hour later*

Buddy:  Wait!  I have a lunch!  My grandma packed it for me!

Me:  Alright.

*At snack time*

Me:  Buddy, why are you eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?

Buddy:  It is my snack!

Me:  Are you sure?  That’s usually a lunch.

Buddy:  I am sure!

*At lunch time*

Buddy:  I don’t have a lunch!

I look in his lunch box.

Me:  I see a drink, string cheese, grapes, and chips.  I think this was your lunch with your sandwich.

Buddy:  Are you sure?

No.  No, I am not sure, Buddy.  I am not sure about anything.

I am quite proud of myself and how I am handling the start of the year.  I made dinner all but one night.  And that is something to commend me for.  The night I didn’t make dinner was the night I felt the least joy.  That is because one firstie was slapping my hand and I called for admin and then he bit the administrator.  And then I came home and pigs were out-

So I got them in and gave myself the night off from making dinner.

So.  That was the first week of school.

The boys also started school.  HD is in 10th and LD is in 9th.

*Best Back to School Photo Ever*

LD was nervous to start school.  He felt like one of his teachers was very serious and was sure he was going to get detention all the time.

Me:  Hows it going with that teacher?

LD:  Mom.  She is like a different person.  She is like . . . smiling!

Me:  Well that’s good.

LD:  Yeah.  Maybe she is just still happy because its only the first week of school.

I took the boys to The Beauty Operator and LD has somehow finagled her into helping him start a mullet.  May the Lord Bless Me and Keep Me.

HD got new glasses from Bob.  HD now towers over Bob.  We are still fans of Bob.

Happy Saturday!

 

David was the all important “Turn-Buyer” again for this year’s fair.  Last year, I had to go and pick up 30 pigs for him on a Tuesday morning.  As people do.

But this year, I was not needed!  Darn.  He and LD took care of it and I am happy to report that pigs are still absolutely vile and disgusting.

Nasty.

Me:  David!  You have got two pigs out there that will NOT stop fighting.

David:

Me:  They are literally the worst.  They bite each other and squeal.  Its horrific.  Please kill them first.

David:  Will do.

I am such a different gal than when we first moved out her.

Taylor 2.0.

Everyone over here in the land of us is getting ready to go on our BIG LABOR DAY CAMPING WEEKEND GETAWAY.  Yes, reader.  David’s kin from near and far travel to join us for this fun-filled weekend.  Kate even called asking if I could book her a last minute flight home for the weekend!  (Nope)

David’s brother, Alex, and his wife drove in late Wednesday and stayed with us.  Lucky for them, Thursday morning was Pig Butchering Day!  First gunshots were scheduled to ring out around 3am.

Alex, ever the adventurous spirit, came out and joined David.  David, Alex, HD, and LD butchered nine whole pigs Thursday morning.

Want to know the worst part about this entire event?

After David, *ahem*, “dispatches” the pig, the pig will scream.

Makes for a pleasant morning.

 

Lauralee, Alex’s wife, surely finds us to be quite normal.  I made her some coffee and chatted while I was getting ready for work and then I had to just abandon her.  She was working from home and counting gun shots.

What fun!

As I was trying to walk to my car, David wanted to talk to me.  Of course, he must still continue the butchering process as he talked to me, and as much as I tried to avert my eyes, I saw things that will scar me for life.

He just kept talking!  And when does David talk?  And why at this moment is he so chatty?
Me:  Dude.  I gotta go.  I just canNOT anymore.

And off I went.  Haven’t seen him or any of the others since.  They were so excited they have already left for camp.  Hadley and I are coming late due to work and school schedules.

***

Hadley’s boyfriend is still far away in Coast Guard training.  She has been getting letters, and Reader, the first letter was a bit sad.

One line read:  Please to continue to send letters as they are like Christmas presents to me.

Let the records show:  Hadley misses him.

***

I got my hair done a few days ago.  When I arrived, there was a lovely older woman there finishing up before me. She was very spunky and friendly.  She referred to our hairdresser as her “Beauty Operator” and I found that to be quite fantastic.

So.  Now I will call Lisa, my hairdresser, my Beauty Operator.

Perfect.

Beauty Operator and I decided I should go darker.  And I did.  And I like it.  And let the records show that not ONE male in my home likes it.

Not.

One.

But I do.

I will show you the only picture I have, but first I must tell you what is going on in said picture.

Our district always throws us a lovely Welcome Back event complete with a delicious breakfast.

But then dang covid came and we no longer got the lovely breakfast.  It was more like snacks, maybe.

The night before-

Teacher Friend Kim:  If they try to give me another cheese stick, I am going to lose my mind.

And here’s Kim and I the following morning.

With our Teacher Appreciation String Cheese.

We miss hot breakfast!

So.  Anyways.  My hair darker, but not that much darker.

LD:  Ugh.  Mom.  Why do you have BLACK HAIR.

Let’s move on!

My room is ready for my new group of firsties!

I met 20 out of 23 at Open House night.  I already love them all.

Let’s discuss.

I can already tell one little guy is going to be a recurring character on this blog.  Let’s call him Buddy.

My class is all a flutter with parents and students and siblings.  I am trying to meet everyone and answer questions and reassure everyone that its ok if they cannot pronounce my last name.

Buddy glides on in.

Me:  Well, hello!  You must be Buddy.

Buddy:  Yup!  I am!

Me:  I am so glad you are in my class this year!  Are your grown ups with you?

Buddy:  Nope!

Me:  Really?

Buddy:  My grandma brought me.  She can’t come upstairs.  She told me its best if I just come see you.

Me:  Oh, ok-

Buddy:  SO!  Is this my first day?  Is this school?  Am I doing school?  Am I starting now?  What’s this?

Me:  That’s your book box.

Buddy takes the book box out of his cubby and starts to peruse them.

Buddy:  Oh, this looks too hard.  I can’t read.  I can’t read ESPECIALLY when its hard.

Other parents are noticing him and chuckling.

Me:  Well, good news!  I am going to teach you how to read!  That’s my job!

Buddy: Oh!  Can I do computers now?

Me:  No, not now.

Buddy:  When do I get to go on a computer?

Me:  Sometime soon!

Then Buddy took a few more laps and left with his paperwork to give to Grandma.

And about 15 minutes later he was back.

Me:  Buddy!  What are you doing?

Buddy:  I came back!

Me:  Does grandma know where you are?

Buddy:  I think so.  Ok, I am going to check out the playground!

And off he went.

A bit later I heard his name being called over the intercom.  Obviously grandma was looking for him.

I called the office and told them to check the playground.

Another precious girl came in and she and her family do not speak a lick of English!  They are from the Ukraine and had a translater.  They were extremely sweet and the girl is super precious.  I am a bit anxious about how I will communicate with her at first.

Towards the end, a little girl I recognized from last year popped in.  I had her brother last year.

Me:  Hi!  Is your dad here?

Girl:  No.  We walked by ourselves.  We heard you were having a celebration!

Me:  Does your dad know you are here?

Girl:  Yes.  I had permission.

Girl is over the moon excited to come back to school.  She got her free hot dog from PTA, saw where she will sit and her new locker, and will come back on Tuesday.

***

Auntie Datenut is being a good Auntie to the dogs.  She permits them to hang out on her porch with her.  She saves them food scraps and always has a bowl of water out for them.

Sometimes, I look out my kitchen window and can see Auntie sitting on her porch working on some mending.

It makes my heart happy.