The Lumberjack's Wife

A List.

1)  Since we last spoke, we have gone on two camping trips.  The first one was with David’s work, or as Little Dude refers to them as “Dave’s Work Van Friends.”

This is humorous because:

A)  He should probably refer to “Dave” as Dad.  But whatever.

B)  David drives a work van.  And so do his fellow comrades.

I was informed that I would most certainly NOT be the only wife camping.  Alas.  I was the ONLY wife camping.

2)  Raise your hand if you think “Dave’s Work Van Friends” were bummed that there was a wifey present to ruin their manly man fun.  They probably wanted to burp, fart, and blow stuff up, but had to mind their manners instead.

3)  We returned from that camping trip on Sunday only to go back to camping on Wednesday.  On Wednesday night, David dropped the bambinos and I off because he had to be a part of the Work Van Gang on Thursday.  My parents camped with us on Wednesday.  And we spent Thursday doing what my side of the family does best:

Shopping.

We went to a nearby town and had a great time perusing the thrift stores and antique shops.

I got the kids to participate in taking this commemorative photo:

Yes.  This was the best photo I could get.  Trust me.  I tried.

And why is there a lioness attacking a zebra next to two dashing bull elks?  I ask you?

Instead of making lunch at camp, we went out to lunch!  Little Dude fancied a slice of marionberry pie.  I was worried he would get his shirt stained, so I tried to make him a napkin bib.

I fear he didn’t quite grasp the concept.  But napkin capes are also awesome.

4)  Since we were the first ones at camp, we had to save sites for the other campers who would soon be joining us.

This was my attempt to create a “campsite.”

Looks legit, doesn’t it?

5)  Camping was busy, per usual.  On Friday, we went to a nearby town and rode bikes, picked blackberries, and swam at the beach.  On Saturday, David and I, along with our two girls, had to leave and go clean our rental.  My parents, bless their hearts, offered to watch our two darling boys.  They are still talking to us, so it apparently went well.  On Saturday night, the girls and I joined David’s Mom, brother Alex, and sis-in-law Holly, on a moonlit Kayak ride and it was probably my most favorite part of the trip.  We had a grand time!  On Sunday, we floated the river and then rushed off to see the fireworks show.

Yes.  Fireworks.  You heard me.

My cute niece hung out with me for a few minutes.  This is rare because my nieces usually pick my daughters over me.  Apparently they are more fun that I am.  But I snapped a cute photo of the two of us while it lasted.

You probably can’t tell, on account of my awesomeness, but I have no idea where to look when I am taking a picture of myself.  Just an FYI.

When the fireworks started, my niece got scared.  She turned to her mom and said,

“Mom! I think I need my lifejacket!”

Ha!

6)  We came home from camping yesterday (Monday) and had to quickly attempt to clean everything up so we could get ready for school.

7)  Tuesday came.  I was not ready for school.

8)  Today (Tuesday) was the first day of school.  It did not go as HORRIBLY AWFUL TERRIBLE TRAGICAL BAD BAD BAD as I thought it would, but it was not fantastic by any means.

Two kids cried.

But then again, let’s look at the bright side. Two kids DIDN’T cry!

Win!

Our day started at 8:40 am, which was 10 minutes behind schedule.

It happens.

I was hoping to end by 3-ish and didn’t end until 4:30, but a lot of that has to do with working out kinks and new curriculum and whatnot.  The girls worked on finishing up assignments until 5:30, which was later than I would like, but they did a bit extra.

Here are some “back to school photos.”

Sweet Pea, 5th grade

Daisy Mae 4th Grade

Handsome Dude, 1st Grade

Little Dude, Kindergarten (but doing all the same things with brother-makes it easier on me!!)

I ain’t gonna lie.  Today kicked my hiney.

Here’s to hoping that we survive this year!

Happy Tuesday!

So.  When last we spoke, I shared with you the sad fact that we are now hillbilly hoarder redneck type people.

Remember?

My husband took care of it.  Isn’t he the nicest?

That’s where all the scrap lumber/ t-posts were once thrown.

True.  The wood stove child safety gate is still there.

True.  If you look hard enough you can see a pile of horse poo in the driveway.

True.  We got weeds.

Nevertheless!  It looks much better.

The most hilarious part to me is his “burn pile.”  The burn pile is where he throws burnable materials.  You know.  So he can burn it.

Stand down, readers!  This is completely legal in our neck of the woods.  There is currently a burn ban, however, there are times during the year when it is perfectly legal to burn on our property.

Would you like to see David’s “burn pile?”

I use the term “burn” quite loosely.  The “burn pile” was created about two years ago and has yet to see a match.

However.  It is the “burn pile.”

And here is a picture of my pretty chicken coop window box.

Because I need pretty things in my life.

***

The girls have been away at camp.  This was their first year.  Daisy Mae had a meltdown when I dropped her off.  She was hyperventilating.

Camp Leader:  Can you tell me why you are scared?

Daisy Mae: I-gasp-don’t-gasp-want-gasp-to-gasp-leave-gasp-mama-gasp.

Camp Leader:  Have you never been away from your mama before?

Daisy Mae: No-gasp-I-gasp-have-gasp-not.

Two things:

1)  I have never heard her call me “mama.”

2)  She has totally been away from me before.  Like lots.

But it all kind of made me feel special.  She went on her (sorta) merry way, with her sister who was not one bit dismayed at the thought of parting with me, and I haven’t heard from them since.  I pick them up today.

So, it’s just been me and the dudes this week.  And, man!  My boys are exhausting.  Let us look at the excitement that was yesterday, shall we?

We are going camping tonight, so yesterday it was our job to clean the trailer and get it all ready.  The boys were ecstatic at the thought of cleaning the trailer.

Why?

I cannot be certain.

Handsome Dude:  Mom!  MOM!  MOOOOM!  Is it time?  Are you ready?  Can we go clean the tray-wer?

Me:  Nope.  I am not ready yet.

HD:  Oh, man.  Do you got to put on your makeup?

Me:  No.  My makeup is already on. (thanksfornoticing)  I have to clean up the kitchen first.

So, in order to speed the process, Handsome Dude decides that HE, himself, shall clean the kitchen.  And he enlists Little Dude to help him.

I leave for a second (foolish, I know), and come back to them pouring liquid dishsoap into each glass, rinsing it and repeating it three times before loading them into the dishwasher.

All while pouring water onto the floor.

So, I thank them for their helpful contribution and tell them I will take it from here.  As I am finishing up, the boys are wrestling/jumping, kicking/playing trucks, and high-fiving simultaneously in the living room.

I kick them outside.

I get into the trailer and the boys join me.  They have somehow located three brooms and are using all three of them to sweep whilst I am trying to go through the cabinets.

I kick them outside.

Handsome Dude:  Mom!  Can we get the eggs?

Me:  Yes.  You may get the eggs.  Quickly, please.

I go back to my cleaning and kind of lose track of time.  A few minutes later, the boys run back towards the trailer screaming:

“Mom!  We need scissors!  A baby rabbit is going to DIE!”

You can imagine my surprise as to how a baby rabbit’s life got involved with the simple task of gathering eggs.

I step out of the trailer and look towards the chicken coop.

They have left the door to the coop open.  Hens are free and wandering about.  They tried to catch a baby rabbit in a fishing net.  The baby is tangled up in it and the net is caught around its neck.

They have not gathered any eggs.

I, Taylor, the farm and ranch wife that I clearly am, managed to free the baby rabbit from the tangled mess without having to cut the net.

Holla!

But, seriously.  My boys exhaust me.  And I love them.

When their father came home, I congratulated him on his two new best friends for the evening.

They had a good time.  (But I had an even better time-ha!)

***

11 Days until school starts!

Guess who is absolutely, 100% not ready?

A couple of weeks ago, we were walking around our property with David’s brother and his wife.  It was during this very walk that I realized David and I had turn into true country hillbillies.

Allow me to elaborate.

In one corner of the yard, you will find a pig feeder.  It is no longer feeding pigs and is now serving as a lawn ornament.

In another section of the property, you will find spare Bobcat tires.  Because this is what everyone needs in their lives.  Obviously.

You will also find other various items, such as, but not limited to: pig waterers, rabbit water bottles, red buckets, fishing nets (for to catch loose rabbits.  Obviously.), Bobcat accessories, Bulldozer accessories, utility trailers, chicken wire, metal t-posts, wood scraps, bicycles, and . . .

horse toenails.

I shudder.

It was like we were on our very own TV show.  Hoarders:  Hillbilly Edition.

My husband has a problem.  If it is free, or a smokin’ deal, he must get it.  So he comes home with certain treasures he has found for free at the dump, or along the side of the road, and just kind of tosses them somewhere.

Metal fencing he scored for free at the dump? Tossed in yard by shop.  Now full of weeds.  Sat for two years.  Never needed it.

Kayak paddles found on the side of the road?  Sitting in garage.  But do we have a kayak?  Nay.  Nay, we do not.

Free scrap lumber from jobs?  Let’s just toss that in the driveway.  Because it looks pretty.

Welcome to the nightmare that is my life.

I told my husband that I was feeling a tiddly-bit discouraged regarding the property sitch and he devoted an entire weekend to cleaning, purging, and organizing.

Seriously.  Be still my heart.

My husband is a hoarder.  It’s a problem.  And the more we got in to his “stuff” the more horrific it got.

I mean, I knew he liked antlers, but . . .

this might be a bit of an obsession.  Oh, and see those windows in the background?

Free at the dump.  Because you never know when you need them.  It’s been three years and we still haven’t needed them.

But you never know.

And now, I shall show you my secret shame.

The old rabbit hutches.

We have around 6 of these hutches in a circle in the front of our yard by the house.  And I mean the FRONT.  It is almost as if we are super proud of them and they are the main attraction of our property.

They are ugly and no longer being used.  I have wanted them moved for a year and a half.  Because they make me want to cry.  Or braid my hair, wear jumpers, and walk around with a piece of hay in my mouth all the time.

Yesterday morning, David wanted a list of chores to do.  And I was like,

“well, if you insist . . . ”

So I casually put:

MOVE RABBIT HUTCHES

So, he got his Bobcat and moved them!  Holla!

But, then I noticed this:

He started pushing over dead trees with the Bobcat and creating quite the mess.

WHICH WASN’T ON THE LIST!

Boys.

In other news, my husband got hisself two more horses today.  Because we can’t ever do anything on small scale.

Here’s Little Dude visiting with one of the new horses through the trailer.

He did not have a growth spurt.  He is standing on the wheel well.

Meet Ellie:

She is 14 years old and I believe she is going to mainly be David’s horse.  There are some horse trails not too far from our place and I think he is hoping to take the children out on trail rides when they are ready.

Let the records show that he has not invited me on a trail ride.

This is the other horse, Heffie (solid brown) meeting Rhubarb:

(See that metal gate in the bottom right hand corner of the picture?  That is our old child safety gate that we put around our wood stove.  It is in that area of the yard because . . . . ?)  (See?  Hillbillies.)

The two news ones are on the left.  Their names are Heffie and Ellie.  Rhubarb is the paint mare on the right.  We got her a couple of weeks ago.  She is trying to be a part of Heffie and Ellie’s family and they aren’t letting her in their little clique.  It is quite disheartening.

We were all sitting on our little porch, watching the horses try to get acquainted.  My cute kitty, Mr. Poppers, came by and snuggled with me so Daisy Mae took a picture of us.

He is my fave.  Want to know why?

He basically requires nothing of me.  And I appreciate that.

And he slaughters mice.  I basically love him.

Happy Sunday!

This summer is flying by.  Usually around this time of year, I am looking forward to summer ending and fall beginning.  But not this year.  I feel like we just got started!  We have been busy, busy, busy.

On Wednesday, the kids and I cleaned our vacation rental.  I had a few days in between renters, so I had already taken home all of the laundry, which saved oodles of time.  The reason I am sharing this with you all is this:  my girls were so helpful!  They helped me get through the house and we made all the beds, cleaned the entire house, and mowed the lawn in 2 1/2 hours.  Usually (with laundry), it takes me about 5-6 hours by myself.

And my boys?  Well.  They did a great job just SITTING STILL and watching a movie for that entire time.  I know that doesn’t sound like much, but for my boys, that is huge.

Seriously.  Their one job is to sit.  It is hard for them, because I ask them to please not eat the throw pillows (true story) and pee on the bathroom floor (even truer story).  Bless their hearts.

On Thursday, we picked up the girls’ friend and headed to the amusement park.

And it amused us.  It did.

Hold on to your pants, folks!

My boys are old enough to go on the bumper boats without adult supervision.

They cannot yet use the bathroom without adult supervision, but driving a boat while simultaneously spraying people is a task they have mastered.

We drove some cars.

Sweet Pea and Handsome Dude

Have I mentioned that Sweet Pea now wears contacts?

Daisy Mae

Little Dude and I

Afterwards, we went to my parents house for dinner because Sister Meagan was in town.

Remember Sister Meagan?

So we are having dinner.  Sister Meagan brings up a topic and I start to ask her about it.  My mother, from across the table, tells Meagan we need to drop the topic because it might upset my father.

I cannot tell you the topic.  My mother forbade it.

Forbode it?

Forbid it?

Whatever. It’s a no-no.

Meagan looks at me and tells me to drop it.  I am a bit taken aback because I do not know why this particular topic must be dropped.

Meagan:  Did you drop it?

Me:  Yes!

I look at David.

Me:  Can you give me more pork?

David:  Why?

Me:  Um . . . because I want more?

My dad looks annoyed.

Dad:  Did you drop it?

Me:  YES!

Now Dad is super annoyed.

Dad:  She is always dropping things.  Just like at our old house and the house before that.

Now I am uber confused.  And David is still grilling me as to why I want more meat.  Which makes me feel like he has started to monitor my caloric intake.

And I take issue with that.

David:  Well, what happened to your original pork?

Me:  I ate it.  It is in my belly.  And I am desiring more.  Is that ok?

I am laughing.  Meagan is laughing.  My dad is looking more annoyed.  I know not why.  Everyone is staring at me and I take a drink of iced tea.

The coaster has stuck to the bottom of my glass, and when I lift it, the coaster falls to the floor.

My dad hears the clang.

Dad:  NOW WHAT DID YOU DROP?  And where is the pork?

And then it was all clear to me.  Everyone thinks I am “dropping” my meal everywhere, as if I were a toddler.  Nobody is aware that we were “dropping” a topic.

And David is still questioning my motives for wanting more pork.

My dad is reminiscing about past “episodes” of me spilling food all over the place.

“Remember the spaghetti disaster of aught-four?”

I take a drink of iced tea and David asks me, yet again, what happened to my pork.  I look at Meagan and I have one of two choices:

1)  Spit my tea all over her.

2)  Spit my tea back into my glass.

I chose the latter.  Because I am super classy like that.  And because my parents have a booth, and I was on the end next to a wall, I could not get out and empty my glass.

So I just kept drinking out it.  Drinking my spit-up tea.  Like a proper lady.

And I will never ask for seconds at dinner again.

***

I best be off.  I need to get my girls to Writing Camp at the library.

Total homeschool nerds, my friends.  We are total homeschool nerds.

Raise your hand if you thought I was pregnant.

I’m not.

The big news around here is . . .

We are officially horse owners.

This event was three years in the making, my friends.  David told the girls they had to save up a certain amount of money before they could start looking for a horse.  They met their goal this past spring.  This summer we have spent many hours and MANY dollars building a fence and a barn.

And last weekend, David and the girls picked out a 14 year old paint mare named Rhubarb.  And did I just sound smart right there?  Throwing down words like “paint” and “mare?”  I hope so.  It was my goal to impress you.

Ask me not what a mare is.

I think paint refers to the color pattern.  But really.  I know nothing.

Who names a horse “Rhubarb?”  I would vote for a fantastic name, such as Gladys.  Or Ina Mae.

Anyways.  The horse was prenamed.  Such is life.

So now, the daily routine is the kids eagerly await for their patriarch to return home.  When he arrives, he leads a Beginner Horsemanship class right in our very backyard.

Complete with popsicles.  It is all very exciting.

What do you think will come next?

A second horse?

A cow?

A goat?

What say you?

Alex and Holly came to town this weekend.  So, of course, we had to go on the boat.

I’m sorry!  Are you confused?  Do you not know who Alex and Holly are?

Alex is David’s brother.  Holly is his beloved.  Please try to keep up.

And, no.  We do not have a boat.  But Jack and Lisa do.  And Lisa is David’s sister.  Is it all coming together for you?  Hmmm?  HMMMM?

Yes.  A boat ride.  Here are some photos to capture this special event in time.

You’re welcome.

Here is David insisting he can fit into this life jacket.

Which is made for a child.  And isn’t just a little sad that he has to tighten the straps?  Yes?

But at least he is being safe!

David, Alex, and Jack had some sort of bet going on for their tube ride.

They look a bit goofy.  They are super manly in real life though.  Promise.

They had some sort of contest to see who could last the longest on the tube.  In the spirit of all things safe, the boys (or men . . . you be the judge) would push each other off.  While the boat is moving mind you.  The last person on the tube was declared the winner.  And everyone always wants to be the winner.  I think Jack won because he was the last person actually on the tube.  But David said his hand was always touching the tube and, even though he was in the water, he pushed Jack off the tube and declared himself the winner.

But I think Jack won.

Of course if David actually reads this blog post, I would like the records to show that David is totally the winner.  He is awesome.

Look!

That is a bay.

You may ask, “Taylor!  What is so special about that there bay?”

Well.  14 years ago, David took me on a boat ride and proposed to be in that very bay.

So, there you go.

Sweet Pea: driving the boat like a champ.

Fear not, Worry Warts!  Jack was closely monitoring.

Alex and Daisy Mae were like two peas in a pod on their tube ride.

For reasons unbeknownst to me, Alex would randomly put his legs in the air.  As you can clearly see in the photo above.

They had a good time.

Alex and Holly’s dog, Cruise, also enjoyed the boat ride.

He stayed on top of the boat like that the entire time.

Will wonders never cease?

Happy Tuesday!

I am supposed to be planning out my homeschool year.  Instead, I am blogging.

And I wonder why I feel so stressed out during the school year.

A list!

1)  We had a mother robin build a nest in our front porch.  She faithfully sat on those eggs and they hatched!  It was uber exciting to see it all.

Here is a picture of mama robin feeding the babies.

Yes.  The picture has a smudge.  Deal with it.

This mama bird was constantly having to feed her little babies.  It was a full time job.

They were always hungry.

Reminded me of my own baby birds.  Speaking of which, Handsome Dude woke up last week asking,

“Mom, can I have four English Muffins for breakfast?”

Um, no.

There were three baby birds in all.  The last baby had trouble actually leaving the nest.

Our cat, Mr. Poppers, was watching him-just waiting for that bird to falter so he could have himself a little snack.

Fear not!  We locked Mr. Poppers up for awhile and, after a few hours, the baby bird was gone.

We *hope* he was gone in the sense of “he flew away!” Not gone, as in, devoured by some creature.

2)  The girls and I had a “Girls Night Out” on Monday.  David was working late and we were already in town for the dentist (4 kids, no cavities-holla!).  My mom watched the boys and the girls and I enjoyed a boy-free night.

Everyone needs a boy -free night upon occasion.  Especially us.  Have you met our boys?

Precious?  Yes.  Exasperating?  You betcha.

Aaaaaannnnnnddddd . . . . I love them.

Anyways!  Girls night!

Yes, we took this picture of ourselves.  Can you tell? Hmmm?  Can you? Can you tell I have no idea where to put my eyes? Hmmm?  It was tricky.

The astute reader might notice that Sweet Pea (middle) is not wearing glasses.  This is because she now wears contacts.

CONTACTS!

3)  We have a bat in our shop.

And that’s all I have to say about that.

4)  I took the kids to the gym yesterday.  Remember?  I have a gym membership?  Because I lack a brain?

After we swam, the boys and I went to the family locker room.  In this locker room, there are two bathrooms and a common area.  I sent the boys together (big mistake) into one bathroom whilst I was in the other.  As I am getting dressed, I hear my boys causing a ruckus.

Oh, yes.  A ruckus.

I quickly dress and opened the door to my bathroom.  As soon as I do this, Handsome Dude, who is completely naked, opens the door to his bathroom and shoves his brother, also naked, out into the common area and closes the door.

Why?

Well.  Why not?

May I remind you that any person could walk into this scene at any given time.

So I pull both boys, who are ever so confused as to why they might be in trouble, into my bathroom.  And Handsome Dude has the audacity to tell me he can’t change because we will see him.

He needs his privacy.

Hello?  You were just prancing about family locker room in your birthday suit.  I think not.

The family locker room.  Not for the faint of heart.

5)  Speaking of Handsome Dude, do y’all remember how he makes up words for food?  He used to call cereal, “Silly-roll” and if he didn’t like something, he would tell me,

“I can’t eat that.  It makes me sausage, you know?”

Well.  I took the kids to Costco the other day, and as a special treat I bought David the bottled Frappucinos.  I had a coupon!  I also bought tortillas.

For dinner that night, we had tacos.  With the aforementioned tortillas.  Handsome Dude would not stop calling the tortillas Frappuccinos.

“Dad, can I get my own frappuccino?”

“Mom, I think I need another frappuccino.”

“These frappuccinos are good!”

Poor, confused lad.

6)  I found a new food blog and I am really enjoying this gal’s recipes.  Her blog is called Mel’s Kitchen Cafe.  So far, I have made her Sweet and Sour chicken (seriously-so good!) and Beef Stroganoff.  Tonight, I am trying Sweet Balsamic Pork Loin.

Can you guess where I got the pork from?

Yes.  That’s right.  From our very own pigs.

Oink.  Oink.

Look at me with my big-girl-eating-animals-I-knew-in-real-life pants on!

Alright.  I should probably figure out how I am going to facilitate the education of a 5th grader, 4th grader, 1st grader, and Kindergartener.

If you don’t hear from me, you can assume the planning of it all killed me dead.

Later, dudes.

Earlier this week, I posted some pictures for you to guess as to what we have been up to these days.

So.  Here we go.

1)  Our Cat Flam-i-lee hath arrived.  The astute reader might recall that we already have kitten named Mr. Poppers.  We answered an ad from someone needing someone to take a stray mama cat and her baby.

And because we like acquiring gobs of animals (hello, 30 rabbits!  how ya doin, 40 hens?  10 pigs?  Why not!?), we said we would take them.

Here is Little Dude with the baby kitten.  Her name is Daisy Sue.  She is terrified of everything.

The kids named the mama cat, Mrs. Poppers.

Do you get it?  Do you ?  Hmm?

We are still just getting to know our new feline friend, but this we know to be truth:

She hates Tank (the dog) and Mr. Poppers (her betrothed).

Loathes them.  Hissing.  Fangs.  Claws.  The whole enchilada.

Cat Flam-i-lee for the win!

2)  The girls have been helping David work on the horse fence.

They finished Monday night!  Now they are working on the barn.  Because we love to spend all our monies at The Home Depot and every Farm and Ranch Establishment in the near vicinity.

Horses!  Not cheap.  And we haven’t even gotten one yet.

3)  This is the most exciting update of all, my friends.  I have launched a full force attack on the peach walls that permeate my home.  What’s that?  Were you not aware that my entire house was sprayed peach when it was built by the original owners.  We are talking ceilings and everything.

Here is a picture from when we first moved in:

Seriously.  I shudder.

We painted the living room and kitchen areas last fall and I made it my own personal goal to rid my house of the peach this summer before homeschool starts up again.

Homeschool.  I shudder.

Anyways.  I have been painting for five days straight and I painted the walls AND the ceilings in the master bedroom, master bath, and homeschool room.

Go, Me!

Turns out I am not-so-good at the whole ceiling painting thing.

David helped me out with the vaulted ones in the bedroom.  And yes, I look fantastic in this picture.  You would too if you had been painting for 12 hours straight.

I am on a mission, people!  Begone, peach!  Begone!

4)  And now, for a sad tale of woe and broken dreams.

A couple of weeks ago, I was in my parents’ backyard.  They just moved into a new house last fall and we were there helping them with some yardwork.  I looked up and discovered a tree laden with cherries.  We laughed for joy at the good fortune and started planning out all the delicious treats we could make with this bountiful fruit.

Pie filling!

Jams!

Oh, the joy!

The amount of planning that went into this event, which we dubbed Cherry Fest 2013, was insane.  Supply orders were placed on Amazon.  Canning jars were collected by the dozens.  Sugar was purchased at Costco in an ungodly size.

We were ready.

On Sunday, we went to my parents’ house for Cherry Fest 2013.  We picked cherries for a couple of hours, not even getting 1/5th of the cherries available because the tree is gigantic.  As we were picking, we were even sampling a few of the delicious treats.

Heavenly.

We finished picking and got to pitting.

Pitting was the pits.  The pitter was taking forever, so we resorted to pitting with our bare hands.

And that’s when we saw them.

Worms.

At this point, we are fully into our mission.  We have spent hours with these cherries and we are not going down without a fight.

First we try to reason.

Surely the heat from canning will kill the worms.

Surely it is not harmful.

Surely we have eaten more disgusting things in our lifetime

So, we went back to pitting.  But more and more of them had worms.  Some worms were even escaping from the bowl and having a meet and greet on my mom’s kitchen counter.

So we made some calls.  We called two people whom we feel are quite lenient on these matters.  People who would not bat an eye at eating road kill.  Surely they would tell us that worms are a splendid addition to cherry pie filling!

We were mistaken.

They declared it disgusting.

So, with heavy hearts, we took all our cherries, and their wormy friends, and dumped them.

The saddest part is not the fact that we had to dump them out.

Nay.

The saddest part was how desperate we were to convince ourselves that we were okay with eating worms.

That is all.